Chapter Fourteen - Husbands

"Son of a bitch." Julia said under her breath. "I asked you if you fucked her, Jay. I came right out and asked you."

"But I didn't. Not when you asked me. You were still with Tav, Julia."

"It does not matter."

Hearing that Hayley was an 'in between' didn't help the matter. Hearing that she had still been in Tavin's bed didn't help the matter. None of his excuses or explanations helped the matter. She was still angry and she let him know that. "For future reference, Jayson Keller, you are in no way, shape or form, whether we are together or separated, to go to bed with that cunt. I don't care if I am dead or alive or you are stranded on a deserted island together." Oh, his words stung her to her core. The very mention of Hayley Bond had opened up a years' old wound in her heart. "Anyone else, I would be a little more understanding." She huffed as she shook in her hospital bed. She was so angry, a crimson shade on her face and she trembled, balling her small fists as she restrained herself from pummeling him.

"Wanna see her?" He asked after a half hour of silence. He sat in the chair opposite her bed, feeling like shit long enough. He'd watch her transition from angry to a waterfall of tears, which he couldn't fathom because he hadn't cheated on her. If he'd been with her, it wouldn't have happened at all. "I know you miss Hannah as much as I do."

"Please, I need to make sure, so all this anger is justified." She commented, wiping her tears away with her tissues. Jay pulled out a dying cell phone and opened up his photo gallery. He handed the cell to her. She scrolled through a few photos and then handed the phone back to him. "That's her." She would recognize that baby a mile away. She'd held and fed and soothed and cared for Hannah long enough to know her when she saw her. "So what now?" He explained Hayley still wasn't sure, that the baby could be Kev's. He reminded her that Hayley never laid eyes on Hannah. Death had intervened, so, of course, Hayley would think Shy could be Kevin's daughter. "Shy? She named her Shy?"

"Cheyenne."

"Like the Indians?"

"Yep." He answered, taking a seat again.

She didn't speak again, but Jay did, explaining the modern miracle of DNA testing. They do it everyday on Maury, so he and Cheyenne would be no different. Only they wouldn't be on national TV with their confused baby daddy dilemma. Jay thought out loud till the nurse put him out for the night.

"I'm being discharged in the morning." Julia pulled her sweater around her body, curled up on her bed for the night and left him go home.

"What's up, Jay? Julia alright?"

"She's fine. Coming home in the morning." Jay set his bag down and removed the gun, tucking it behind his back. He felt and looked strange doing that in reality based time. He wasn't used to carrying a gun. He had forgotten to leave it with Chess. He'd carried it and his bag of cash into Mav General and hadn't given it a second thought. Chess had taken more than half the money and handed it over to Jody, but left him with a percentage of it. He tossed the bag on the counter, then tossed the rubber band stacks to his brother.

Tav hadn't ever held that much money in his hands at one time. "What the fuck, brother. Where did you get this much money?"

"Pay off the house and I'll give you more in a couple weeks."

"Jay-"

"You plan on selling it." Jay reminded him. "I'll buy it, then you can get the fuck outta my house." He mumbled as he passed through the living room. He had a few more weeks with Jody under the weather to earn it like he did that day. Tav almost argued or spoke or commented, but Jay was not hearing him. "I'm not in the fucking mood." Jay was tired of hearing Tavin complain. He'd been bitching and moaning for years, holding the house and responsibility bullshit over his head. He wanted to leave from day one. He wanted to find a place and raise his son and live like a normal person. This way, Jay thought as he climbed the stairs to his door-less room, he had handed Tavin his way out. Didn't mean they loved each other any less and it didn't mean they would not be family and remain close, but it did mean they wouldn't live together. Simple as that. Jay would take over, and somehow manage.

He pulled his gun box from beneath the bed. He opened it and placed the gun from his back inside, then stripped off his clothes to his underwear. The bed never felt so comfortable in his life. And he was out before his head hit the pillow.

Tavin was in the hospital before his shift and standing inside her room before night shift had ended. Julia had already been awake, that 4am internal alarm of hers could not be turned off. He welcomed himself inside and set a steaming hot cup of Colombian black coffee in front of her.

"Hello, handsome." Julia said as she hugged him hello. It had been so long since she had set eyes on a young and handsome Tavin Keller. She had been used to a graying and more mature Keller brother. Still attractive in his own right for his age, just shy of 50, but this one here had her swooning like a teenager again. In uniform no less. "Did I call 911, Tavin?" She asked as he took a seat on her bed and sipped his own coffee. The aroma of hazelnut nearly made her gag, but she focused on the smell of his cologne and the presence of his palm against hers.

"Red, what the fuck is wrong with Jay?"

"Oh, something about Hayley." She muttered, flicking his palm with a dull spark. Connect dammit...why couldn't this scarred and chatty twit connect to Mr Keller? She debated informing him of Hannah-Shy, but held back, because that would be a discussion she'd have with her dreadful, midget husband. "My Lord, you are so handsome. I nearly forgot how fucking handsome you were."

"Yeah, Red, thanks." He smiled.

"So what's your problem this early in the morning?" She overlooked the coffee altogether and held his hand. The feel of his strong hand in hers had her mind churning out the most indecent thoughts, a stirring deep inside her that she could barely recognize, she hadn't felt it in so long. The man she called her closest and dearest friend, her companion, her cohabitator didn't compare to this fine specimen of male anatomy who chose to visit so early in the morning.

"He kicked me out of my house."

It appeared as though we're making new ways in this place she called the past, rewriting a history without regard to the consequences. "Take Tare and go, and for God sake leave that whiny and ungrateful Kelly behind as well."

"Uh, alrighty then. Was this your idea?"

"No, my friend, it was yours." Quit wasting your time on this and go. Never should have moved here to begin with. "I remember telling you it would not work out between you two and you didn't listen. You never change and she'll never accept that or live with it."

"Well, thanks a lot, Red." He said, trying to pull his hand away. She yanked his hand and holding it whether he liked the idea or not. "Are you trying to connect with me?" He asked, wiggling his fingers. "Quit shocking me, it hurts."

"Sorry, I'll stop." She said, loosening her grip on the handsome brother's hand.

"Come here." He whispered, tugging her palm. No, no, no, not Tavin...she heard in the recesses of her brain...please do not go there...But Julia did and she leaned to him despite the noise inside her head. No, no, no, Tavin...Her hand sparked him and he heard her loud and clear, swimming inside the energy she flicked into his palm. "Nevermind, stay there." He nudged her back with his shoulder.

"Thanks." Julia said. "Trying to get me in trouble. With you of all people."

"It's true, there's a MILF in there somewhere." He grinned.

"She's obviously gotta get on the same page." Julia mumbled, leaving Tavin's hand go. "Oh, thanks, coffee." She sipped the strong Colombian black liquid and listened as Tavin described the moody interaction with Jayson. Cash, an illegal gun, his directive to get the fuck out of his house. Had his normally calm and emotional brother lost his mind?

"Ask him." Julia replied, settling back on her bed with her cup of coffee. "Damn horny woman." She whispered. "Hasn't been laid in ages. You seem to turn her on. Like she's never seen your fine ass before."

"Where am I gonna go, Julia?"

"Does it even matter? Who cares? Just go and do what you want. She's right, it's what you wanted to do since you got here." She shrugged, listening to the cougar in her head as she had the most inappropriate thoughts of Tavin. "Old Julia needs to get laid, ASAP."

"Are you serious? There's like three of you in there."

"Present and accounted for. My sister never left, just been dormant all this time and the old one jumped me from the great beyond. You're doing a number on her for some reason."

"It's the dick, Red."

"More than that, always was." She replied, setting her coffee down. She eyed the clock. "Gonna be late, handsome."

Julia lay on her hospital bed, waiting for the IV to finish. Jay arrived to silence. He reacted the same way he always reacted when she was angry with him, he waited her out. Silently wishing one of the others would at least speak to him. Were they all an angry red haired legion, bonded together over this? Jay waited out the IV by getting her things in a bag for her, packing up neatly. Once they IV came down, the nurse pulled the longest IV catheter he'd ever laid eyes on from her arm. She applied a dressing and told Julia to hold it for five minutes, then she could get dressed. "But leave the bandage in place, Julia." The ever happy blond nurse called as she left the room. Julia followed instructions, considering she didn't want to have any unnecessary bleeding a half hour before leaving the hospital. She dressed quietly in the bathroom and came out to toss clothes at him, which he folded neatly and placed in the top of her bag. She finally sat down, wrapped up her left ankle with her ace wraps.

"You gonna be mad all day?" He asked her. She didn't respond, which was a resounding yes to him.

Saying nothing was better than launching an all out rant at him. Silence said zero words. She totally lacked communication skills.

"Maybe all day...the rest of the year..." She finally said.

The nurse returned with her paperwork and she signed all the right places. She was given her script for the antibiotic that she would take four times a day for an entire month. A month...she tucked the script in her pocket and similar to the last time they were in the hospital, she didn't wait for transport, they walked out. He drove her to CVS where she put in the script to be filled and he had no money to pay for it.

"We'll be back." She said calmly to the cashier at the pharmacy. Such was the life of the unemployed. It was a couple hundred bucks to pay for the month's supply and Jay had no cash on him. No cards. Nothing. "Jayson." She said sweetly. "You gave all your money to Tav."

"How do you know?"

"Cause he told me when he visited me this morning before work. How are we paying for my pills, Jay?"

"I don't know. I didn't think about it."

"Ya serious?" She asked him with her sweetest voice. "You handed all the money over to Tavin."

"Yes,"

"So how are we paying for..." She took out her phone as they got to the car. "I'll call the husband that actually takes care of me." She said over the roof of the car to him.

"What did you just say?" He asked, looking like he'd just been hit. He felt that statement inside him somewhere deep. A place he couldn't explain if he tried to. He felt like leaping over the roof and putting hands around her neck. "Say that again. Please, cause I didn't quite hear you right."

"You heard me." She said in her sweet voice.

"I. Hate. You." He said very calmly. "I hate you, Julia." He opened the car door and he reached in the back seat and he threw the bag over the roof of the car at her. It hit her square in the chest. The ring he wore came off next. The anger and the rage kicked up inside him from the same place he felt that one sentence she said a moment ago. He regretted saying it as soon as it left his mouth, but he felt it. If he could put an emotion to how small and insignificant he felt, then hate would be the best description. He held back the other thoughts that ran through his head and he would never say those things aloud. He'd already said enough.

That was mean...She heard herself say in her head. Old Julia was not in favor of hurting Jayson. She caught the bag from falling and placed the strap over her shoulder. She looked at the ground where his band lay. "We don't take our rings off, Jay." She told him in her same sweet voice.

"Shove that ring up your ass." He got in the car and he locked it before she could open the door.

"Jayson." She whined, pulling on the door handle. He started the car, backed out of the parking space and he left her standing in the parking lot of the CVS. "Son of a bitch." She cussed into thin air.

She would have stomped, but her foot hurt.

His anger had been building from the day before in Philadelphia with Hayley.

Jay always tried to maintain a cool head, a sense of rational that most people didn't understand. He always, from the day he learned of the shooting years ago, tried to think through every thought and action everyone ever made. He read books, he looked on people as people and always found the good in someone. He always tried to be thoughtful of other's feelings and emotions, not letting the anger and the rage take over. He stayed sober because of it, didn't drink or self medicate. Every once in awhile, Julia got the best of him. Sometimes it was a look, a sound she made or sometimes the words she spoke.

Jody had never been on the receiving end of Julia and he had never planned on being run down by her either. He could sympathize, because he'd dealt with the most psychotic and unhinged part of the woman in Jersey, cold hearted and angry and downright despicably mean with words and actions and no one, not even Chess, her husband, the King himself, was permitted to overrule or go against the grain. When Julia spoke, it was. There was no question or room for objection. She meant every word and action and never took it back.

Jody had done a world of good, listening to him and calming him down. Thankfully for her, he got an earful and calmed Jay down before he got to throwing everything she owned out the front door to the lawn. Jay rarely got angry. If he did, Jody witnessed it only once. He'd sensed that vibe one other time, at the fortress the night he held a gun on her. He was highly emotional and whatever she had said to him or done to him in the dorms that night, he wasn't privy to. But he was unhinged and mean. The Jay across the counter from him had the exact same feel to him.

He had an unreal calm about him that Jody didn't like. He sensed the vibe, the energy coming off him, and it made him uneasy. "Yo, you're not gonna hurt her are you?"

"No." Jay answered. He admitted the strong desire to run her over with the car in the CVS parking lot and it took great restraint not to do so.

"Oh, know what the queen told me in the hospital yesterday? This may be helpful." Jody began his oration of how the Z virus acts on the human brain and then post infection can cause depression and even lead to psychosis.

"What are you fucking talking about? She's vaxxed."

"Julia's reaction may have started this whole depressive psychosis, grumpiness that Queen spoke of."

"Jody, this is the last time I will tell you this, so listen very closely."

"Alright."

"She was fuckin nuts before any virus."

Chess was at Home Depot when she called him from the CVS parking lot. He found this story of hers amusing as hell. What the hell did she expect Jayson to do or say when she said those words to him? "Babe, you verbally castrated him." He realized that Julia was not cut out for marriage or relationships. No matter how hard she tried, she always fell flat on her face and she never could keep her damn mouth shut. "I would have left you there too." He told her from his spot in line at Home Depot.

"Where are you?"

"Home Depot, buying paint and stuff on baby mama's list. I'll be there soon." He said to her as the cashier started scanning his items. "Hey, can I get some ass?" He asked on the off chance she was feeling charitable. The cashier eyed him. "Not from you, ma'am." Chess said toward the older lady in her orange smock. For a fleeting moment, he thought she was considering the request.

"Odds are not in your favor." Julia answered.

"Ah, odds are better with my lovely cashier." Chess winked. Women...

She had a lecture from Chess once he got to CVS. Not every guy could take an insult like that and bounce back. Not everyone was as seasoned as he. He could weather her mouth and her actions and rebound pretty quick, and for some unexplainable reason found it sexually appealing. But Jay was sensitive. He had no job, thanks to her and the money from the incidents could only stretch so far. He felt for his cousin. Jay was not a gangster, a killer, a dealer, a marine, a gun runner. He was filling Jody's spot till Jody felt better and Chess didn't even need him to do that. He didn't want to deal with Jody's thug ass relations. He hated them, too. They had Jay at the mention of the word blunt. He sat and bullshitted with these people, knew their true names, had a rapport. Jody never did that and neither did he. Jay friended them.

"Why would you ever say that? You can never take that back, ya know."

"He said he hates me. Threw his ring at me, Chess."

"Wouldn't be the first time one of your husbands did that." He shrugged, looking at her hand. She had at least left hers on, hadn't tossed it back at him. "There's only so much we can take, babe. Your mouth is-you can be so insulting sometimes."

He waited in line with her at the pharmacy counter and he refused to pay 200$ for her medicine, which he realized was a mistake on the part of the pharmacy and not the true cost. They had charged her for the medication without her insurance. Once remedied, the cost was 15$. Jayson could afford 15$ with the change he had on the floor in his old car.

He nearly pulled out 15$ and paid for the medicine. He told the pharmacy tech to hold the medicine in the bin and she would return for it. She was as confused as ever as to why he would suddenly hold off and make her leave the store. "There zombies in there or something?" She asked as he put his hands firmly on her shoulders and guided her out of the CVS.

"Nah, I can't do it."

"It's only 15$, Chess." She whined as he took her back to the spot he'd found her only 10 minutes prior.

"I know that, which is better than 200$." He took out his keys. "I can't though. What you did to Jayson is fucked up. I am on his side with this."

Instead of arguing, insulting or having a tantrum, this alliance in testosterone didn't surprise her in the least. She held the ring in her palm and she slid it over her finger and off her finger.

"Julia, swallow your pride. Do whatever you have to do to make this right."

"Yes, Chess. Thanks, Chess."

"I don't take care of you either. Money doesn't mean a damn thing when it comes to taking care of you. Actions, love of my fucking life, speak louder than words and dollars ever will."

"But, Chess, you've been doing that too."

"It's my damn responsibility, Julia. Ever think about that?"

"In what way-"

"At first, there was no way you could do it yourself. I thought it was the least I could do since it was me that started the crazy train rolling. I did certain things and Jay had the hard part of actually dealing with you. Then, thinking the end of the damn world was imminent, it was important to clean you up, or try to. Then you went and offed yourself and-"

"You rescinded. You are obligated to take care of me."

"Exactly. Whether he can or not. I have to make my damn self available to every single, solitary crisis or dilemma you have. It's more than marriage and friendship or owing you. All your problems become my problems. You, of all people, should understand this, because you created this little game in a fucking lab a year and a half ago."

"But it's give and take. It's all you giving right now, so what do I have to give back?"

"I don't freaking know. I haven't figured that out yet, but when I do, honey, you'll be the first to know." He raised his voice at her again. "Cooperation. How's that? Watch your damn mouth, babe." He pressed the button and unlocked the truck. Before he left her on the sidewalk outside the drug store, he debated handing her 15$.

He couldn't very well interfere with this. He'd be nuts if he did. He'd also piss his cousin off and have him redirect that anger toward him, only verifying what Julia had insinuated to him. He knew deep down that Julia was pissed off about Hayley and Shy. He knew that she hit him with that as a weak retaliation for the baby in Philadelphia.

Being that she was stubborn as ever she took a seat on the curb and took her punishment like a woman. She asked him for a cigarette and he handed her one, lit it for her. "I'm sorry."

"Apologize to me again and I will break your neck, Chester." She snapped at him. "I will say, husband, this is most sensible decision I have seen you make yet." She said, inhaling on the cigarette. "Give me another, then leave me." He handed over another as requested and pretended he didn't realize the switch off. He went about his way to the truck as she tucked the cigarette behind her ear. She left off a sarcastic little queen of England wave from the curb, more dismissal than goodbye. She had been left worse places than Maverick in a time without civil unrest. The dead do not walk the streets and there was not evil around every corner she turned. This was not New Jersey in thankfully what was a mild winter as her friend Mayers would say.

She sat on her curb like a queen on a throne and she absorbed the sun into her skin. She watched cars drive by and people come and go. So crowded the CVS in the late morning. She finished the smoke, which made her head slightly dizzy, then lit the next one off the cigarette she had just smoked before she got to her feet. It had been a very long time since she dealt with the immature table of hers, the generation that expected everything handed to them. Kids today do not value the...she remembered she was in her past and not at home. She summoned the young one, the one who could manage the discomfort of a healing injury and she directed that young one to walk the hell home.

As Julia walked, absorbing the pain in her leg, which was no where near the worst of the pain she had felt during this fracture and its healing process, old Julia gave them nuggets of truth and wisdom from all her 45 years on planet earth. "I take care of myself." She stated. "Repeat, ladies, I take care of myself." The youth of today was so used to having the world at their fingertips, being provided for and being taken care of. Yes, the two with whom she shared synapses had been in positions where they could take care of themselves and others on top of it. Why that hadn't rubbed off on them in real time was a mystery.

Chess had punished wifey, thereby punishing those who walked with her. The young one carried them home footstep after painful footstep. It took near an hour and the young one even had them off course a moment, making a turn down the wrong street near home. She'd led them astray only momentarily and she heard her ask, 'where is the house?'. Unfamiliar with Tavin's particular area of Maverick, her history a slight bit off than the history of the original Julia's, she stepped in and redirected. All the small streets in Tav's neighborhood looked alike and she knew where she was when Julia placed her on the proper street.

She was met with a bit of a cold shoulder. Testosterone had formed a united front. Nonetheless, she pushed through the door and through the house and to the second floor to the door-less room where Julia rummaged in the nightstand drawer for her debit card. Surely there was 15$ on there. There had to be. Money management was not her strong suit, especially when she used, but she had 15$. Then she spied the Percocet. Being that she had card in hand and a long walk back to the CVS, she took that baggy with the Percocet and she went into the bathroom where she took two of them down her throat with a handful of water. Since none of the men were willing to speak to her and she hadn't yet atoned for this sin, she went out the house the same way she entered and hoofed it back to CVS.

One small step for woman kind, Julia gave these girls a lecture on modern females. Not the modern female that walked among her, but modern female in terms of maturity that females like Julia, herself had grown into through a series of trial and error. We are not superior, we are not inferior. That being said, grow the hell up. Quit waiting on your man or men to come up with and direct your futures. You should know by now, after all that you have lived and endured, that the future is yours for the taking. Create it, ladies.

Opportunity lies all around us. Why wait for tomorrow what you can do or learn today? Chess has taught us a valuable lesson this afternoon. Normally she did not side with Chester Morgan. As times changed, the streets across the free states remained clear. Once that vaccination came to fruition, post clearing, and the wheels of semi-modern medicine started rolling, the free states gradually moved on from militaristic and guarded and without rule of law. New paths meant new ways and new ways meant a revolution in thought and ideas and advancements of the human race in a post rebellion-revolution era. Old school men and women had stagnated and stuck in their ways. The next gen had grown and matured enough to rally the strength to set them on a new path to reunification.

Women had more of a foot hold in that era, those who were strong and respected of the original generation, such as herself, were sought out and convinced to help change the direction of a nation. When there is no war, no risk, social issues and problems resurface and people start to feel entitlement all over again. Women's issues became a topic of much debate and women wanted back their rights, their rights as a female sex, their rights as humans, to be looked upon as equals. It was an ageless and timeless battle, one Julia thought most petty and unnecessary.

Women do not accept their fates and futures as directed and handed to them by their fathers. If women want their come uppance, then women must be educated. Beyond that of simplistic house chores. The rebellion-revolution era served at setting women back 100 years into their servant submissive roles.

"So what did you do to help?"

"Oh, dear, nothing spectacular, I wrote a book. My story, my beliefs, my opinions would not guide a generation of females to any glory. I felt it may inspire. Creating a future does not, in my view, include drawing a line between male and female, only encourage a mutual respect. That is all. I sought to inspire the young women to create their boundaries, set limits, and put some thought into their futures. Not as a whole, but individually." She explained. "Once the nonsense of distraction is removed, a female can focus. It does not matter the way a woman becomes great, but the plan she creates to make that happen. Women are, sometimes, only as strong as those men who surround her, and that is what we are surrounded by...men. They make or break us. Use them, but do not abuse them. Know your place in the world and then use it to your advantage."

"Choose the people."

"So to speak. The right people have to be chosen or it could be a disaster." She added. "Those who start off as the right people, they lose track along the way. Then, you must find new people. Currently your chosen person has lost his way, softened, has lost focus of our bigger picture. Suffice it to say, he is doing it with love and respect. It took years for him to get there, so he is ahead of the game on a conscious level, however it is too soon."

"You speak of Chess."

"I speak of Chester, yes. He never gave a fuck. Now he has many fucks to give, albeit he's giving the fucks to the right people and for all the right reasons. It is too soon for that."

"Chess is experiencing a revolution of feelings."

"What feelings? He has no feelings. He has no compassion or-"

"Ask her. I didn't spend the last year with him."

"Where did she come from anyway? I don't understand why she is involved with this or us? Who in the world is she?" Julia asked in reference to the young and happy one. Happiness, she who fills with light and has an affinity for pain, Julia had never come across this one. "I attempted to guide you, yet who is she?"

"My sister." Julia responded dryly. That had been the adage she'd been given when in company of others. There were obvious and slight differences physically between them. "My universal sister." She quipped, feeling that was more apropos a description. "She's Chess's girl. He replaced the love of his life with the love of his life and I consolidated the loves of his life into one tight and fit body thanks to klonipin and vodka."

She's from the flipside. We all have our flipside alternative persons, those who live equal and opposite in a different time and place. We have merged...transitioned, she thought...through our own independent actions, co-mingling, living in reality and the flipside, connecting to ourselves and creating a conundrum in the present. Blurred together, merged together and now all sentient in one tight and fit 17 year old body with the identification of a 22 year old. We have been poured into one cup by the universe, a mixed drink, fire engine red...all the same brew yet with a slightly different taste and quality and purity. One in the same and so very different, depending on who you ask.

She swiped the debit card, having interacted with the same pharmacy tech three times on one shift at the CVS. Julia Morgan's signature was scrawled on the card reader. Three separate names could have been written. Julia Fry, Julia Morgan, Julia Morgan-Keller. She chose the name on the debit card. We are and always will be Julia Morgan. Julia, she who despised her husband, yet never had the opportunity to divorce her husband, had made that name famous and infamous across the course of time.

She returned from her round trip from CVS. The trip took a lot less time and was much less painful thanks to the Percocet. She set her bag on the kitchen counter where he sat on the lap top. She took hold of his hand and she put his ring back on. He allowed her to do so, and when she didn't leave go of his hand, he let her hold onto it, she thought that was a good sign. He tugged at her, guiding her to the counter stool next to him and sat her down.

She had put herself in a spot without the help of any substance. She could fuck up sober too and jealousy, as she had informed Chess not too long ago, was a strong emotion. The very mention of Hayley Bond and Shy had drop kicked her back to a farm house and that rage and betrayal was revisited all over again. Although circumstances of this conception were slightly askew from the original circumstances of conception, it hurt the same.

"We could have figured this out. You didn't give me time to." He replied so calm and easy. No anger, no sadness, no hate. He'd spent the entire time she was out trying to figure out why she had said that to him.

"I didn't mean it the way it sounded, if that makes sense." She needed to cover the problem of the day, resolve the issue that had sparked this animosity. "There's certain things Chess does for me and there's certain things you do for me."

"You." He stated. "Are not married to Chess, Julia."

"Understood." She nodded in agreement. "I get that. Totally. Yeah," She replied. "It's cause of Hannah, you know."

"I figured as much." He didn't want to spark that conversation again. He felt as though he'd explained his side of the story and made it very simple for her. "Nothing to be jealous or angry about though, Julia. I did not put her between us. She was a non issue. I haven't fucked around on you. I didn't and I don't plan on it." He paused. "And for future reference, if you're mad, then just say why and we'll deal with it. Don't do dumb shit and say dumb shit to hurt me."

"Did we make a mistake here? It was rather impulsive and-" She answered, looking at her ring on her finger.

"No." He replied before she could manage to find a hundred reasons to justify why they should have thought better of putting rings on each other's hands. "You are not and never have been what I consider a mistake." She always felt so consumed and guilty for everything she'd done. "Bigger picture. This isn't working for any of us. We're all doing shit none of us wants to do, so what do we want to do?" She opened her mouth to speak, then held back. He observed that and discouraged it. "Julia, what?"

She hummed under her breath and hesitated to say it. It was so negative and so harsh and so equally opposite of what he'd want to hear from her. He laughed at her hesitance, because the first thing that came to her mind was disturbing, but made her feel so damn alive and purposeful.

"What the hell is it? Jules, what would make you happy?" He sounded insistent and he didn't intend on budging till he got an answer from her.

How the comment she made placed her in a conversation about happiness confused her. Ultimately one off handed, inappropriate comment led them to a conversation about the lack of direction in their life. She lacked any specific goals, but inwardly knew what she wanted to do. Putting it into words in the context of reality and forming a plan of action was the issue.

Julia pointed at the lap top, tapped the word 'Philadelphia' into the google search engine, then tapped 'images'. Hundreds of pictures then appeared on the screen, living and dead, dark streets and mobs of people who had armed. "I want to be in the middle of that." She whispered, pointing at the screen. "All the time, Jayson. That's what I wanna do." She clicked on a picture, which took her to an article about the Killadelphia incident. "I want to be immersed in chaos." She said, clicking on the arrow to play the video that someone had filmed that night. "This makes sense to me."

Jay slid his cell phone across the counter and set it in front of her. "Julia," He was tired of going over this. He was tired of watching her lost and confused and unsure. He opened the contact list to Fields' name. "Get a fucking job then."

"What's one thing have to do with the other?"

"It all connects, Julia."

"I cannot do what I do here and now."

"Yes, you can."

"I don't trust these people. I do not trust her."

"Maybe you should start to trust someone. She helped you. She was the one who found us the people we needed to talk to. Think about it."

"I do trust people, Jay. Not everybody, but I do trust people."

"I didn't have a chance today, Julia. Do you trust anyone other than Chess?"

"Yes."

"Not today. I didn't even have a chance to figure it out today, babe."

"Was a bitch move to make, I admit. Wanna know why? Cause he explained it to me, Jayson."

"So he did go there and he-"

"He left me there too. He agreed with you. But he explained why I call him and-" She quieted with that, slipping and letting him know too much. "The women in my head agree with you and apparently so does everyone else and that is fine, because I was wrong."

"He explained-"

"He explained why I was wrong, yes." Back peddling her statement, diverting him from him from her statement's original meaning. "I was mean and I was out of line."

"Out of line, were you? Is that him saying that or you?"

"I apologize. Not very kind of me, so I am sorry."

"I don't hate you either. I'm sorry I said that, but imagine the things I held back."

"Yep." She smiled. "But you got every right to be mad at me, baby." She looked at the clock and smiled. "Got at least an hour before this house starts filling up, you know."

"So what?"

She slid off the stool to her feet, "Look, I am no good at lame apologies and swallowing my pride is just off the table. On the other hand, I am an expert at swallowing other things. Wouldn't you agree?" She placed her hands on his knees, then moved them up his thighs slowly.

"Well, I won't turn you down. But is this how you plan on fixing things between us all the time?"

"Probably, Jay." She started tugging at the waist of his jeans. "That a problem?"

"What about when we're old? Around 80 and still fighting?" He adjusted on the seat and left her unbutton and unzip easier.

"She's screaming at me." Julia backed off him.

He looked around them, they were still alone and he heard no one. "Who?"

"Damn woman." Julia mumbled. "We have a problem." She added, folding her arms across her chest. "She says no."

"Who?"

"Julia." She answered, shaking her head.

"Over ride her."

"Can't do that, Jay."

"Why?" He whined, looking most disappointed as he slid to his own feet. He zipped and buttoned his jeans and put his hands on her waist. "Why?"

"Cause," She listened to the voice in her head, sighing deeply, laughing slightly. "She can't."

"What?"

"Damn woman." She said under her breath.

"I'm her Jayson, though. She was like crying on me for an hour a few days ago. What-"

"Awe, that...she says it is not in the cards." She paused. "Oh, come on...I can't do that. I-" She looked at Jay. "She's a bit panicked."

"But why? I don't understand."

Julia's face went blank a moment, flattening and lost expression. She then looked at him teary eyed and nervous. "I said no." She wiggled her hips from the grip his hands had on her and moved away from him. "No." She pointed at him. "No." She raised her voice to him.

"Ok, Ok, what is wrong with you? I don't want you either, if it's any consolation." Jay raised his hands for her. "Hey, just bring back my girl and-"

"No, majority rules here."

"Fuck that. Julia. What majority?"

"Is the young one a virgin?"

"Hell, no." Jay answered. "None of you women are." He watched as she listened. Were they arguing amongst themselves?

"We haven't discussed this yet."

"Oh, my God." Jay groaned.

"I don't just go to bed with men anymore."

"I'm-me? I'm me. I had all of you first. It's kind of a universal thing we do, Julia."

"NO!" She shouted. The frustration was clear on her face at this point. She blushed, her face turning a light red. "Jay, you promised me you wouldn't speak of that. You explained it so it made sense and now you're changing your mind." She put her hands on her hips and looked every bit as young as she was inside the right body. Mannerisms, tone of voice, even her foot tapping on the linoleum. "Why would you bring me into this? It's between them, Jayson, and now they know. What if they tell Chess?" She looked just fine as she paced the floor, anxious and nervous and visibly afraid. She didn't want Chess hurt. Not because of her. "I should have been honest when we talked about it. Instead, I let him think...He's going to be so upset, Jayson."

"Uh, you never cheated on him." Jayson said, shrugging his shoulders. "We talked about this. Jules, they won't say anything to him."

"Sister will. Sister tells him everything. She's got a huge mouth, Jayson."

"Not if I ask her to keep it between us. She's cool. She kinda already knows."

"Jay, I am so upset right now. He's going to be so upset with me. I always felt guilty, you know, letting him believe I wasn't like her. He wanted it so badly and I let him believe it."

"You're nothing like her."

"I knew it, Jayson. Shoulda just been honest with me. What's the big deal?"

"Is there a medication for this?" He asked sarcastically. "Seriously, because the three of you...babe, please, I can't do this. Pick a personality and let's start all over."

"Old one's not giving you the green light."

"What for? I mean I am kind of a big deal. I thought she'd be happier to see me."

"Jay, not funny. She's on a rant about New Jersey."

"What about-I am so tired of hearing about New Jersey." He complained, moving around her and her personalities.

"Where are you going?"

"The bathroom. Leave me alone." He stomped away and upstairs, leaving the legion at the counter.

Chapter 13- Connections

Julia refused to stay in bed. Instead, she took to the chair by the window and she kept eyes on Maverick at night. Jayson had long left her, because visiting hours had ended and she had nearly refused to stay until her medical situation was explained in full detail. Her initial injury, her weeks trying to recover, her trip through zombie town. She had no recollection of anything near related to zombie town. She searched through memories and nothing similar rang a bell until she found out the date. Someone had planned ahead. Someone had stopped the zombie apocalypse before it happened. She had thought she had no more questions for the universe. She thought she had seen all its cruel and all its wonderful surprises. The universe works in mysterious ways. Some had been revealed and some kept secret.

She wrapped in a light blanket and she sipped a soda from home. She hadn't had the pleasure of soda in many years and it tasted like pure heaven. She had jumped from the depths of hell in New Jersey to the plain and peaceful life of Maverick, Pennsylvania. What she had hoped to find, she hadn't found. She expected a war with the dead not to be standing in a world among the living. Electricity, running water, cars on paved and clear streets, advanced medical care. None of that had mattered, because what she found was Jayson Keller. A pleasant and sweet surprise that had devastated her emotionally. She hadn't seen him in twenty some years.

He swore he would be back in the morning. He promised her, first thing, he would come back and talk with her. At this point in the game of life, she yearned only to hear his voice. Holding his hand and his body against hers had been a bonus. Once he'd left for the night, she acclimated herself to her surroundings and her new frame. She hadn't laid eyes on her youthful body in years. She looked like an old car that went into the shop and came out with a brand new chassis. No nicks or dings, well...except for a couple scars...not her scars...and the body she lurked inside, she didn't recognize. Must belong to the chatty one...she thought, the ebullient one, the one who loved life and had an affinity for Chess Morgan that he didn't need to beat or restrain, connive or dominate into her.

She affectionately called the other one, drunk slut. She'd come across the drunk slut a couple times. Once she brought Mayers home from parts unknown, then having left with him the direction they traveled. Then again after the birth of Caroline Keller. For all her drunken and sober antics, she had at the very least patched the strained relationship she had with Antonia. Answers that Toni had sought, only she as her mother could answer. The road trip to Florida, having killed McGill, having several relations with several men and then going into the VA and working her ass off came as no surprise. The one rule the girl did not break was communicating with Chess Morgan.

There were things she didn't know, the bad blood, the betrayal, the pain and the hurt he'd caused. Waking in the hospital room alongside her husband hadn't been anticipated. She successfully avoided the man at home. In the company of respected and mutual friends in the community, she had to maintain a certain professionalism and act as if he was the king he believed himself to be.

She asserted herself and her dominance over them as soon as she entered their space. The drunk slut explained the current condition and how she had come to be encapsulated inside the young one. Suicide...She spent her entire life struggling to remain among the living to establish a future that was already laid out for her. It had been, she firmly believed, her purpose as given to her by the universe. All she had to do was wait and seize the opportunity. If she hadn't given her the book of Caroline, then they'd all be knee deep in human remains. A birth and death with care and love did not include offsetting the entire future for herself and her family. What was she thinking? Zombies were a fact of life, like it or not, and the feeble attempts to hold on to the modern amenities of life only hastened their family's stake in the future.

Where shall you hide when the nests come?

Chess ended the call he got from Jay demanding to know what he did to piss her off. She's sick. She's not in a coma. They're coming to her instead of her going to them. There was a legion of Julia's inside one head, a multiple personality cluster fuck, a nest of red heads, and one of them surely was unhappy with him. Lord only knew what he had done in some other time and place to piss that one off. The way she spoke and the glare in her eyes, he'd never seen the woman so angry. She looked like she wanted to put him through the hospital window. He could honestly understand paying for and owning up to past and more present sins, but dammit...did he have to pay in the current for future sins as well? So when Jayson demanded to know what he had done to piss her off, he could only respond honestly..."Ask her, Jayson."

Jules had mentioned that they do not speak in the future. She lived with Tavin in Philadelphia and had since she returned from Jersey. That was the basic back story and everyone knew it, but no one truly knew the reason behind it. He couldn't even venture a guess.

If their version of the flipside was anything similar to what they would face in reality, then it was worth preventing. He had never been to war, but he had been to war. His controlled war environment with the dead during his service and then on the flipside, that was the greatest war yet and it wasn't fun. He had kept them secluded from the outside of the fence at the school, knowing it was all a flipside and a dream, that they never ventured out and into the streets. He purposefully let others do it. The problems inside the fortress alone kept them all busy through the first year. Why sink themselves into something that they'd have to hit reset on in August? He tried to make that time as enjoyable and normal as possible, because it wasn't real. He sat back, took notes, watched how it was done and eventually, when the time came, he would manufacture the exact same results himself. Julia had given him the blue print and it didn't come in any binder that she had written. It all went down so utterly and drastically different.

He took his girl to bed and made love to her. Jess was either complaining or horny or both this week. Glad to have him home and next to her and she had plans of her own for him. A list...these women and their lists...she handed one over plain as day and it clearly had a list of demands. All to be carried out and completed prior to her due date. He had his hand in so many different pots lately, he didn't know whether he was coming or going and Julia, the sanest of the three so far, had told him to take a break and take it easy.

Tavin had taken care of the cleaning crew, holding his own glock to the head of the man who came to install the surveillance devices. He mentioned it took every ounce of strength inside of him not to pull the trigger. Kid wasn't much older than he was himself, working a job for Homeland, he'd said. Tavin bound and gagged him, destroyed the equipment in front of him and then went through his phone and wallet. He had his name, Ethan Bates, as well as his address, social security number, pictures of the man's daughter. He didn't kill Ethan Bates in his home that morning, but he beat the living hell out of him.

He learned a few things during their time together. Ethan usually had security with him. In fact, the day they originally planned on installing the equipment, he had two agents with him. He always went in covered and nothing ever happened. The agent would tranq the person or persons in the home, he'd get to work. They'd do one of two things, remove the person(s) from the home or leave them to wake up without any inclination the privacy of their own home was being monitored. Normally the agent would remove specific items or stage a particular scene.

On the day in question, however, the agent, Pierce, had met with the wrong home owner. The homeowner, who Ethan had not seen or known the identity, had successfully shot and killed Agent Pierce. Ethan was instructed to take off at that point, the job had gone south and he hadn't been a part of the fracas inside the house or anything that occurred afterward. He only was there, Ethan said, to install the surveillance equipment and leave.

He left Tavin Keller's house lumpy and bloodied, but alive. He also left with a threat against his lovely daughter, Emily Ann. A kindergarten student whose picture he had in his wallet and phone. A cute and innocent 5 year old whose two front teeth were missing, all smiles. Long pony tailed brown haired child in a school uniform.

"Don't fuck with me or my family, Ethan. I will fuck with yours."

Jody thought that was a little over the top. He sat on the sofa, painstakingly recovering, binge watching afternoon talk shows. This day, he witnessed the entire drama unfold after Jay and Julia had left for the police department. It was not their M.O. to go hunting and killing little kids, kindergarteners of all things. Although they would be easier to catch.

"Not actually gonna hurt his kid, Jo. Damn." And he set out to clean the linoleum of blood without another word.

Chess couldn't believe Tavin took that route with his surveillance installer, but he understood it. The guy was earning a buck like anyone else involved. They had all the information they needed, except for the why. Ethan couldn't give him that information as he wasn't privy to it. None of them could fathom what in their lives was so interesting that they needed monitoring by homeland security. Who were they going to complain to though? Not like they could call the cops and pin anything on the guy. This cut deeper than the local PD as evidenced by the statement Julia had given the detective off the record. Everything and everything was off the record. There was no record, it was all top secret.

Jess's financials were all sorted out. They had gone to a lawyer recommended by Uncle Dom. A nephew of his had recently passed the bar, got a job with a firm in Lancaster. A 45 minute ride and a consult with the newest and gainfully employed Manganelli had him on top of it all. He'd work on it in his spare time and he'd put all the paperwork through, designate someone to liquidate and sell all the assets and handle all the legalities, which was what Jess chose to do.

Chess consulted with his own lawyer, Jimmy Darth, in his tiny office in Oaks, and he had him hash out the possibility of buying that porn site. Ultimately it was way out of his price range and he couldn't afford it even with all the money in his off shore account. He loved tits and ass, occasionally a dick, and he wanted her to keep that site. He hesitated to mention it to Jesslyn, but Jimmy advised him to take a chance and mention the worth to her. Initially she was against the idea. Any normal female would be. He sat her down and he explained the revenue off this site over the course of the year and it would be insane not to keep it.

"It's nasty though, Chess."

"I know you believe that, but it turns a profit when these morons can watch it for free. Jess, think about it."

"I don't know anything about running a business."

Neither did he, but there were already people in place to do just that. Apparently there were two people, a husband and a wife in their late twenties a home office with a business and computer technology degree between the two of them. They ran and kept the site moving. Those two were paid to make it all work and had been since the site's inception. Considering Jesslyn's dad could not have anything to do with it in the slightest. Jeffrey Gilligan's off chance conversation in a coffee house with a young married couple straight out of college had turned into the cash cow that Jess considered revolting.

"We can make this less revolting." He assured her. "Change your view on it. I mean, look at you right now. Us, right now."

Julia would be jumping on this idea and churning out more of her own. If there was a girlfriend that would love this business and all its depravity and filth, it would be Julia. But he was dealing with Jess.

"What about us, right now, Chess?"

"We just made a porn without a camera. What's the difference?"

"No one's watching."

"We used to do that, let people watch." He reminded her.

"No one watched us, Chess."

"Uh, yeah, I remember a lot of times we spent behind closed doors with Jay and Julia. We had an audience and so did they. We watched, we learned and sometimes critiqued. So did they."

"Yeah, but the 4 of us only hooked up like a few times and-only it was all-I don't know. It was all me and Julia after a while-"

"We remember it differently, then."

"So, um..." She hesitated as she cuddled up with him. "You said if I have questions, I should ask them, right?"

"Questions about what?"

"When we were doing all that, did you ever want Jay?"

"No, Jess." He answered. In fact he had never given him a thought in that regard. "He's my cousin. He's straight."

"Oh, ok. But he's cute though." She smiled.

"Cute and related are two different things. So, no, I never thought about fucking Jayson." He thought a minute and then continued. "Being bi made me more open to that happening though."

"But he's not, and-"

"You'd have to ask him why he was cool with it." He said, turning off memory lane at that point and steering her back to the present. "So, that being said, what we did is no different from what they got going on the website. You've done some basic shit and some nasty shit. It all depends on who's watching and getting paid for it."

"I'll think about it."

Thinking about it was a good sign. That site was lucrative. She would be insane throwing easy money that she didn't have to earn away. She wouldn't have to go to school or work and she could easily live off the earnings from the website. Talking Jesslyn into doing things was most difficult. Once she had a belief, it was hard to change her mind. She was stubborn like that and she didn't really care about money like that. She had some morals, this one. She had always known right from wrong, safe and sensitive, content with a simple life. Simple and struggle were two different things. Without an income, if he wasn't around or involved, she would have a rough way to go.

Jess fell asleep, which left him wide awake. He watched the doorway before getting out of bed entirely. Julia had unsettled him. Since Jess lay sleeping, he went downstairs to the kitchen table, opened a beer and went online. He scanned over her list of needs, which made it also his list of needs, and he ordered everything on home depot.com. He planned on picking it all up in the morning. Jay had already helped breakdown and move the furniture. He'd asked Ray, but Jay was more receptive to the idea. Jay would, he realized, help anyone do anything. Kid never said no to anyone.

His heart about leaped out of his chest when the phone vibrated and started skittering around the table. He wasn't usually easy to frighten, but it was late and he wasn't expecting any phone calls.

"Coming to kill me? I'm still awake." He droned when he answered the phone.

"I have spent hours deciphering the mess you have made here, Chester."

Oh, my God, he felt this would be a long conversation with the queen. He'd never had the pleasure of a face to face or ear to ear with the original. "What have I done now, Julia?"

"Why are the street lights on? Why are the dead not walking among us? Why am I married to Jayson Keller? Why on this great earth have you changed the course we made for ourselves and our family?" She asked these questions, but from her tone of voice she was only thinking out loud. She truly didn't want answers. "I understand that you are young and dumb. But we all made crucial plays in this game, Chess, but what you people have done is plain old dumb. You are playing right into their hands." She paused. He could hear her sipping on a drink. "You have destroyed our future, Chester. You and I, no...he and I worked and slaved and hustled to reach specific goals with our family in mind. You tanked our years of work, everything we earned inside and outside that fence, for this? For electricity and air conditioning and cars and gas and cell fucking phones." She was so frighteningly calm and collected.

"Uh, I-"

"Uh, uh, um..." She mocked him. "Have you given any thought to what will come of us without our chosen profession? What's the end game here, Morgan? For God's sake, everything we hold dear is slipping into thin air."

"The fortress. Our house."

"I do not speak of material things, Morgan. I could care less of material things. It's honor, respect, power, control. You, Morgan, have rolled the dice and lost. You have gambled our future-"

"What's so fucking great about it, babe?"

"Do not 'babe' me."

"From what she has said, it's not a future that's-"

"You don't understand, Morgan. You are not thinking."

"Julia, I'm sorry. I don't even know why I am sorry, but whatever I did to you-"

"He doesn't apologize for anything. You have become weak, husband."

"I'm not your husband."

"How could you? How could you allow this? Have you any idea, Chess, how important it is that we stick together in times like this? How is she supposed to accomplish anything with Jayson weighing her down?"

Fuck...this...bitch...

She laughed a moment. "Do you know what is happening at home right now? Our home, our shelter, our safe haven? It was written, remember?"

"In the binder?"

"In a sketch, Chess. We sent Jayson to work. We set this up. We created a plan." She raised her voice.

"It is about the school."

"It's not about a damn building. Could be a circus tent for all intents and purposes, Morgan. We carried out our plan and we reaped the rewards of our plan. Think before you act. You always chided me about that. 'You never think'." She was leading him as only she could. "The fence, Chess. The fucking fence. You're trying to kill us." She raised her voice. "Where are you going to hide us when the nests come? Our fence is being dismantled, genius."

"Don't need a fence, genius." He replied coolly. He'd witnessed the plan in action on the flipside. 

"I see we have a smart ass." She smirked, sipping on her drink. "We do not need a fence, however, you have given no thought to those that do need one."

"You called to criticize me. To argue with me. Baby girl, you know this turns me on."

"Some things never change." She replied with a hint of sarcasm. "I assure you, though, that this no longer turns me on."

"Maybe that's your fucking problem. Maybe you shoulda stuck with your husband instead of fucking off and fucking around with other people. I'm not talking about love or sex either, woman. You know exactly what I mean." He commented coolly, thinking this would not settle well with her. "Where's your fucking loyalty, bitch?"

"I left it in Virginia." She ended the call on that statement.

What the fuck is her problem? Chess asked, looking at the cell phone. She had no right to hold against him the things he hadn't done yet. He had no idea what transpired in Virginia. Before Virginia, during Virginia or after Virginia. He didn't recall ever having given a fuck about Virginia and honestly was growing weary of hearing about the state of Virginia. The family forgave and moved on from the most horrendous of acts and sins, usually involving or rotating around the red head, but they always rebuilt from their traumas and tragedies and came out of it stronger.

Bull shit...Chess thought...this is bullshit.

3 days of nonstop IV antibiotics and being cooped up inside Mav General. She was craving a smoke. Day three and Jay left her alone all day. He said he had work to do with Chess of all people and instead of leaving her alone, he dropped off Mayers.

Oh, my...She thought as he entered the room. He gave her a friendly hug and a kiss on the cheek. The arms and the lips lingered a little too long for her taste, but he looked so fine, she allowed it. The kid could not look any hotter if he tried. Even with the pallor he had on his flesh, he looked edible. She had always enjoyed looking this boy over. She may have taken a turn down the asexual route, but she was after all still female and could appreciate the male form. "Aren't we friendly today, Mayers?" She asked as he patted her red hair.

"No more than usual. How are you feeling?"

"I feel fine. I wish they'd allow me to leave."

"I'm sorry I haven't seen you. I mean, I don't feel good. Today is the first day I woke up with some life in me."

"Good to know."

"Wasn't sure you'd want to see me either."

"Oh," She frowned. "Um, I think it's very kind that you stopped by."

"Well, the other ones are in there somewhere, right?"

"Oh, so you arrived for them?"

"All three." He replied.

Smart choice...

"Unless there's more in there I'm unaware of."

"No, Mayers, but we are all present and accounted for."

She and drunk slut had theorized that once the morphine was out of her system, then the Julia's would fade. Once that Morphine was gone, they were forced to tweak their theory and speculate that once she was no longer ill, then the Julia's would fade. She gave him another once over and realized he looked drained. "The infection will subside. It takes time. I have seen so many men and women in my time fall victim to this virus. Myself included."

"I'm sure you have."

Sitting across from the wife had him on his best behavior. He was withdrawn and quiet. Julia suspected it was post-infection blues. People frequently found themselves down and depressed post illness. It had been documented and widely studied. The world as she knew it when she originally became infected was so classified, unstudied and so unreported. The virus responsible for decimating the whole population and leaving a wake of dead in its place was paid no mind outside the realm of a handful of small and underfunded labs. It was years and years before the true studies were done and then and only then did she understand that depression was part of the virus itself. It suppressed humanity in more ways than ceasing the beating of a heart.

She gave Jody Mayers a rundown of what to expect. He could seek medication since it was available, although it would eventually pass. The depression, the sadness, and sometimes the suicidal ideation was all part of the infectious process. It affected the areas of the entire brain after all before settling into the areas of the brain that control motor skills and hunger. All these years later, there was never anything wrong with Julia Morgan. The infection caused her psychosis. No one knew it then and no one investigated it then.

"Ok, I'll keep that in mind then, Morgan."

She suddenly doubted it was all post infection blues. What was up this kid's ass? She wondered.

"Would you like to talk about zombie town?" She asked him curiously. "I have never heard of such a thing."

"You've been informed." He told her, taking a water bottle from his back pack.

"A bit. I simply asked about my medical condition as I awoke in a hospital bed next to my husband." She paused. "The first one, not the current one." She explained. "I simply asked 'what is wrong with my leg?' and I heard bits and pieces about this place in Maryland."

"That's all you need to know. It was no Jersey by any means, Morgan."

"Ah, I see." She nodded. "No place on earth worse than New Jersey. I think we can agree on that."

"We can and we do."

"Same reasons, I would assume."

"Some differ, boss." He moaned. Her distant past and his past and possible future, both lived it and neither wished to revisit. "I did not leave voluntarily. I would not have left had I known."

"Understood, Mayers."

He shuddered at the thought of Jersey. "I still have fucking nightmares, Morgan." He admitted. "Zombie town, I was infected again. This time I wasn't left behind."

She gave him an odd look. "Weren't taking a bunch of infected grunts home."

"We could have died, Morgan."

"Could have died on either shore."

"Fucking bullshit, Morgan." He mumbled.

"We took you guys out as far as we could."

"They followed." He argued. "Can't change it now."

"Exactly. So what do you want from me now? An apology?"

"No."

"It was wrong." She admitted. "Nothing about war is right, Mayers."

"It was a long time ago."

"Longer for me than you and it continues to haunt me. Doesn't matter how many times I talk about it, write about it, think about it."

"I would not wish it on my worst enemy. What you went through was a million times worse."

She shook her head. "I should not have handed that book over to her. That was for your eyes and her eyes, a testimony to the blunder I dropped into. But she let everyone read it. It was personal and I did not think that she would share it."

"We thought we would never see you again."

"Yet, here, we are. In the flesh. Occasionally this will occur. Occasionally we will cross paths."

"Yes, it appears that way."

Outside the realm of New Jersey's battles and the fortress, which she was not willing to talk about, because it was not her that he met in the fortress. She never returned there once she recovered from Virginia, losing Jayson and then Samuel. When she left and went to work, she left the fortress and everything and everyone involved behind her. Anything that happened in Mayers' company while in the fortress and anything leading up to and including New Jersey had nothing to do with her. She was not conscious or aware during the time that Julia leeched on her brain. They spent a bit of time in awkward silence till Jody rooted around in his back pack and said he brought her something she would enjoy.

"Me, Mayers?" How would he know anything that she enjoyed? He didn't know her well enough or long enough, she thought, until he set a deck of cards on her over bedside table.

"Yes, boss. You." All the Julia's, young to old all had an adoration for cards. He'd seen it across the board, especially out of the Julia he knew and loved. The girl did not like to lose, that's why she played so well. Poker was her favorite card game. "We normally play war." He admitted shyly, because the truth was stranger than fiction.

Julia smiled a genuine smile. The first he'd seen of her since his appearance in the hospital room. She held the deck in hand and she pulled the rubber band from the pack of cards. She started shuffling. "If you'd only brought me a shot and a smoke to go with it, we'd be perfect, Mayers."

"Next time. I don't think the nurses would appreciate that." He grinned as she dealt. He prepared himself for an ass kicking, but she had been helping him along. So had Chess. The two of them were fanatical card players. Even when they were angry or disinterested or depressed or moody, they never turned down a card game. Both obsessed over their cards, each played the same exact way. This woman in front of him was no different.

"I'm rusty I will admit." She giggled a bit. "Tavin doesn't indulge my card playing anymore. He says we have played a million hands."

"You probably have."

"If I had a shot for each hand." She laughed awkwardly, slapping her knee. This woman was a nerd, had a silliness about her that he found amusing. "We say shot because-"

"There's no such thing as dollars, yes. I get it." He had no sense of humor. So dry and so drole. "Go easy, boss."

"No peeking." She giggled, excited to have someone to play with. Occasionally Tarin would indulge her or if Tatia and Greg visited, Greg always played with her. She didn't bring up Tatia Keller and so far, neither had Mayers.

They passed a couple hours playing hands of poker. They played through lunch and through her hour and a half long antibiotic infusion. She noticed Mayers checking out the nurse as she moved around the room, as she hung the IV and as she took Julia's afternoon set of vitals. A cute and young nurse in plain blue scrubs. Typical, pretty blond nurse. "They're a dime a dozen around here, Mayers." She said in reference to the nursing staff. "Oh, I should add a couple more precautions when it comes to the Z virus. You are young and I would assume sexually active, so you should refrain for six to eight weeks till the virus is completely out of your system."

"Uh, thanks for the tip." He said, blushing slightly.

"Yes, studies have shown that even though you feel just great and are back to normal, the virus can still be transmitted sexually. It is a fact, Mayers. Just saying."

"Condoms though-"

"May help, yes. We don't have any of those, so that study is obviously lacking. Good point."

"If you have a vax, then what does it matter?"

"We don't have a vax here and now, do we? No. I am attempting to educate you so that you do not turn whatever lucky female you lay with into a monster." She explained. She always sounded preachy when she heard herself speak. She could never have normal conversation anymore. Anyone who ever spoke to her always had questions and sought answers or they wanted to hear stories of what it was like before the clear states and vaccinations. No one was ever interested in her personal well being it seemed. It didn't bother her much anymore. Once she penned and published the books, people stopped talking to her altogether or would seek an autograph on a copy they carried.

Julia was kinda famous after all was said and done. She had journal upon journal stacked in closets in the fortress and in Philadelphia. She sent people to obtain her journals, which occupied her closet in her room on the second floor of the fortress. It had gone untouched by anyone. Although they hadn't been on speaking terms in more than a decade, her husband never allowed anyone inside her room. No one was to touch her things. Heads would roll.

From those journals, she'd penned a tell all autobiography, multiple factual biographies on Jayson Keller, Tavin Keller and Chester Morgan and others who were significant in forming the free states, which would become the reunified states. She had made the books deeply personal as a full account of the history could be documented. Her best known work was the autobiography, which she purposefully had broken into three separate cliffhangers. All best sellers and left out no detail of the evil deeds, debauchery and mayhem. Who would have thought it? She'd written one specifically on protocols, another that focused on zombie warfare, another that focused on gardening and farming. She kept a wealth of knowledge in her head and in her books.

"So, a lot of people bought your books, Morgan?"

"Certainly. All proceeds benefitted veteran's charities and orphan charities." She nodded, seemingly proud of herself and her life and her accomplishments. "The gardening book was personally my favorite, but not many people were a fan. Women mostly. Old ladies. I have a fan club from the reunified states and the elderly from their homes across the states write me regularly. I always write back."

"That's nice, Morgan."

"It is." She beamed happily with a smile on her face. "I have luncheons with the ladies. Gardening clubs across the reunified states honored me and fed me home cooked meals. I went on tour specifically to promote this book and get outta Philly for a while. They put me up with the finest of accommodations and they listened when I spoke."

"Cool."

"Yes, very. They always tried to marry me off to their aging sons. I went on many a date with gentlemen that lived with their mothers."

"Oh,"

"Again, free food. I was hungry. I also had to be a lady. These women respected me for some reason, even after the autobiographies had been published. The pioneer, warrior, feminist, human rights activist, gardener that I am."

"So you met a lot of guys that way?"

"I don't...men, no." She shook her head adamantly.

"You crossed over to girls completely." He commented as he discarded.

"No, Mayers. I do not even like girls. Females were a fad, a phase. In order to move things along, making men happy was a hobby of mine."

"So you are alone?"

"I live with Tavin."

"He's your boyfriend then?"

"No, did you mean alone as in by myself or alone as in single? They are two different things."

"Single."

"I don't go to bed with men or women anymore."

"Why though? Because of Jersey." He surmised.

"Yes, directly as a result of New Jersey."

Julia quieted and she continued to play, thinking about New Jersey. Seeing Mayers brought that to the forefront of her mind. Julia's dream had been only part of the horror she endured in New Jersey. Sitting warm and comfortable inside Julia Fry's tight and fit and young body was a shocker. So very different from her own carcass she carried around on a daily basis. She took revenge on those men in Jersey, but the damage had been done. Revenge was sweet, but the harm they caused her, she couldn't talk about with Mayers. "It is not your fault, Mayers."

"I realize that, but maybe if I had been there, not lost the jeep, not-"

"I cannot forgive you, because you have not done anything wrong. Understand?"

Jersey savages...Tavin Keller knew about them and their acts upon her. His ears had heard it all as he had to deal with the aftermath of the Jersey chapter of her life. He was her physician after all.

"Yes."

"War sucks, Mayers. As do the traumas and the scars and the injuries we sustain during war, physical and mental. That's all I will say about it."

"Ok, so is my Julia allowed to speak?"

"Sure, Jo. She wants to talk to you though." Julia replied. She sighed loudly. "She is rusty as fuck." She commented as she looked over her hand.

"Come on." He raised his voice and smiled at her. "That's your poker face."

"You know, she's fascinating to talk to. She's got stories to tell for days. Plus she's absolutely ruthless and she's weird and awkward and funny. No filter at all whatsoever."

"Like you, Jules."

"Only you do not fear me." She smiled as she discarded and picked up another card. "You looked terrified coming in here to her."

"You don't understand. You never will understand what she did to us."

"It is a way of life, Mayers. Similar to life, there's good and bad. Wins and losses. Jersey was not the ideal introduction into-" She paused. "It was not zombie 101." Julia said softly. "It was zombie level expert and it was the beginning of your game and the end of mine." She said coolly. "Enough."

Jay stood on the burned out block in Kensington by the truck. He'd been sitting inside, but got thirsty, so he got himself a drink from a street vendor and he watched the clean up as it unfolded across from him all these weeks later. Buildings up and down the block were condemned and burned out shells of businesses and eateries were left in the wake of the Kensington zombie outbreak and riots. He listened as the people passed him by and picked up bits and pieces of conversation. He momentarily wondered if they'd ever found Kevin's remains. He'd probably been part of the mass burn. A couple hundred bodies had been burned in the days that followed the zombie rise and riots, but an exact number had not been released to the public yet.

A black man passed, eyed him, and kept moving, but then returned after a short distance down the block. "Aye, yo, my man." He called.

Jay looked around and realized he was addressing him as there was no one else around him. He was standing next to a truck with bullet holes in the frame. Jay became nervous, but had to stay cool. "I ain't buying nothin', man."

"Nah, man, aye, I remember you." He extended a hand toward Jay and he shook his hand firm. He was in a blue work uniform. "Ah, shit, man, good to see you."

"You sure you mean me?" Jay asked, looking up at the 6 foot 5 inch tall black male with wide shoulders, a little on the heavy side, and Jay never felt as small as he did while standing near this man in his early 40's.

"I mean you, yeah." He acted like he knew Jay, familiar with him and he cleared up the confusion with his story about clearing the Kensington streets alongside him. "Name's Art Sellers, never caught your name, son."

"Jayson." He answered, which started them off on a conversation. Soon others who knew Art joined in and stories of the extermination ensued. By the time Chess returned to the truck, Jay was as comfortable in Kensington as he would have been standing in Maverick.

Jay had a handful of people surrounding him and didn't look threatened. Art shook Chess's hand as well and towered over Chess by more than a foot. He remembered Chess primarily because of his stature. They had been the people who slaughtered and never fired a single bullet from a gun. "Knives!" Art bellowed with a laugh to the elderly man alongside him. "Yo, yo, these kids only used knives, Trev." He added, clasping Chess's shoulder. Chess felt like he had a death grip on him, but he was easy and friendly, having conversation on a street corner in the ghetto. He credited Jay especially with keeping him alive and armed him with a pipe to defend himself. "Hit em in the head, man. Hit em in the head." Art explained, his huge arms in motion as he swung an imaginary pipe. "Yo, still got that pipe, too."

Jay could make friends and conversation with any walk of life. Whereas Chess would have sufficed the meeting with a handshake and keep it moving, Jay engaged people. He asked how they were, how they and their families were getting by after the fall out, once the cameras went away and the military rolled out.

"I'm on the payroll, clearing this out and making way to rebuild, but what they rebuilding ain't what we had in mind." Art's face appeared disappointed. "They building this neighborhood up, taking it out our hands and gonna market this to a different type of folk. They been here, the companies, offering us cash money to relocate outside here. When they rebuild, they want different peoples here."

"You didn't take the money?"

"No, this my home. Nobody took it. We didn't fight for these streets in that war to sell out and leave it."

"Hell naw." Trev, his friend who dwarfed at his side, chimed in. He stood in greasy work clothes and stringy black and greying hair. He had a couple teeth missing and a bit of a hand tremor. "You see dat, man?" Trev pointed to a work area where the dozers moved rubble and soot covered blocks and bricks. "Dat smoke. They still burning em. They been finding more dead people. They burning everyday on every site. Buildings coming down and crushing them don't even kill dem off."

"Yeah, man, be careful out there."

"Yeah, stay safe." Art added. "You ever need a thing round here, you got my digits, a'ight."

"Yep, thanks. Nice seeing ya."

Chess took a tour through Kensington, Jay took some pictures and a few videos, thinking Julia may like to see what was going on there. He would visit her when he got home and take over for Jody.

"Speaking of Jody, think he's hating this babysitting gig?"

"He volunteered." Jay informed him as they made their way to York Street. The further out of Kensington they drove, the more the streets looked like a normal city and Chess complained about driving through it. He finally parked outside Kev's apartment. No one parked in Kev's spot, but Chess didn't really care.

"Where we at, man?" Jay asked.

"Gonna visit an old friend, Jay. Someone you need to see in there." He kept his bag over his shoulder and instructed Jayson to keep his with him as well. They stood, bags over their shoulders at a door on the street level. Chess kept his finger on the buzzer until the door released and he pushed his way inside. They climbed up the flight of stairs, past the chair lift and the apartment door was ajar for him.

"Hi." Hayley said, sitting on the sill that overlooked the street.

"How ya doing, Hay?" Chess asked as he crossed the room to her. They hugged and she saw Jay over his shoulder.

"I'm good." She said quietly. "Hey, quiet alright? The babe's napping." She rounded Chess and took hold of Jay. They hadn't seen each other in ages, since she was pregnant. "You cut off all your hair." She commented, rubbing a hand over his short locks of black hair.

"Yeah, a while back. What's up? How are ya? How's the baby?"

"She's sleeping. I'm alright, waiting on T to get back. He's picking up Chinese for me." She slid her hand over his arm and took hold of his hand. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Work," Chess answered. "Hay, can we see the baby?" Chess asked as he set his bag down.

"Yeah, sure, of course. Please don't wake her. She's fussy."

Hayley walked ahead of them into the room she and Kev used to share, the room she and Terrence occasionally shared. Their relationship was low key. Kev had only recently died and T made it appear as if he was looking out for his friend's girl. Hayley crossed that room to a pack n play and Chess hung back at the doorway. He'd seen the baby a handful of times, but Jayson had not. Chess wondered the reaction he'd have and he would gauge his suspicions by the reaction. He'd seen the baby before. He had no doubt Jayson would recognize Shy on first glance.

Despite Hayley's cautioning them about quiet and not waking her up, Jay paid her no mind. When he saw her he reached over the edge of the crib and he lifted the sleeping baby into his arms. Her eyes opened a moment and Jay rocked her a bit, shuffling as all parents do, from foot to foot with a gentle rocking that would soothe.

"You said she wasn't mine." He whispered.

"She's not." Hayley replied, her voice hushed. "She's Kev's daughter."

"Hay, this is Hannah. You jumped before you ever laid eyes on her."

"Jayson, please."

"You never considered the possibility? Not once?" Jay studied her, same olive skin, same big deep brown eyes, same nose and little pink lips. Same feeling when he held her against him. "Hayley, this is my daughter."

"I'm not sure. I never was."

"Well, I am sure. It's why I brought him here." Chess announced. "I'll give you two some time."

Why Chess chose this particular time and this particular day was easy. Jay was in the truck with him. He'd known since Shy was born. Jody was tight with these two and Kev's crew. He and T were friends. If Jody had not sent him a picture of Shy, Chess would not have known either. As Shy grew, he kept in touch with Hayley and whenever he was in the city, he'd meet up with Jody there and visit a bit before they would go out, walk the streets, party, hit a club or a bar. He watched Shy grow on and off from birth into the baby that he had lived with at the farmhouse, the baby that Julia and Jayson and everyone else cared for alongside Tarin. He'd spent many a night with Julia and a teething Hannah to know that Hayley had Jayson's daughter in an apartment in Philly.

He could have said something sooner. He debated whether to tell him at all, but as Jesslyn's baby bump grew and the day approached that he, himself, would be a dad, he knew for sure that he wouldn't want another man raising his daughter. He felt rather strongly that Jay should have a choice whether he should raise his own daughter. Jay deserved to know the truth. What he did with the truth from that moment on was up to him.

"Hayley, if you're not sure, there are ways to find out. We should."

Hayley was quiet and she watched Jay hold Shy, who had yet to wake up.

"I like the way things are. No one knows we slept together."

"Honestly, you were Kev's girl. T has nothing to do with her. We should find out for sure, Hayley."

"How do we do it then? I'd like to do it without T knowing. Till I know for sure."

"Her doctor. The pediatrician will be able to or tell us where to go." He replied, walking the room to the end of her bed. He sat and held Shy. "Why Shy?"

"Cheyenne." Hayley answered, moving her hand over her daughter's fine brown hair.

"Oh, how very native of you." He commented, feeling the pressure building up in his head, a developing headache...

"Are you mad? Don't be mad. She could be Kev's too, you know."

"How are you doing?" He asked.

"Done school. Looking for a job, you know."

"You don't seem yourself."

"I'm fine, Jayson."

"Ok, Ok." He said softly. "Awe, Hay, she's like perfect."

"Yeah, perfect. All she does is cry, Jayson."

"That's what babies do."

He sat and talked quietly with Hayley for nearly an hour. She warmed up once she realized he wasn't angry or upset with her. They talked about home, the family, the kids and Jess. She mentioned Julia, but he didn't elaborate past a broken ankle and the infection that followed it. He skipped over the whole abduction and Zombie town extravaganza. Hayley had enough on her mind.

They talked about school. He didn't go back this fall, but would go back in the spring. She'd finally finished her bachelor's degree from Penn in business administration and took courses specifically for medical management and administration. She seemed down that her degree she'd worked so hard for didn't land her a job right away. She'd applied to everything and anything locally and every place she applied or interviewed sought an employee with experience.

"I'm a girl with no job. I'm a college graduate and a single mom and I'm miserable. She's a cranky baby, never satisfied with anything I ever do."

"Got any help, Hay?"

"No." She welled up with tears and a few slipped onto her cheeks. "Once I get a job, can take care of myself. I started applying further out of Philly into the suburbs. I don't know. I thought I would have it all worked out by now."

"Yo, Jayson, wanna head home?" Chess called from the other room.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be right there." Jay said, shifting Shy off his chest and onto Hayley's. "Let me know when you make an appointment and where. I'll be there. I want to know for sure. If she's mine, Hayley, I should take care of her too. I would want her in my life, you know."

"Yeah, I will. I'll let you know."

Hayley seemed off. Not her usual talkative and overly chatty self. Hayley was usually so much more full of life. "What's wrong with you?" He asked, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"I-uh-nothing. It's nothing. Just tired is all." She replied placing a fake smile on her face. She placed Shy back in her pack n play and they tip toed out of the room. "You should go before T gets here."

"Yeah, sure." Jay and Chess hugged her good bye and as they stepped out of the building onto the street, the two ran into T with the Chinese food that Hayley had said he went to buy.

"Yo, Morgan, wus up?"

"Stopped by to see Hay and Shy before we head back home."

"Who this?" T asked him, sizing Jay up as gave him a not so pleasant look.

"This is my cousin, Jayson. He's J's boyfriend."

"Ah, man, hey. How's J doing? Tell her I said hey."

"Will do." Jay nodded, standing as tall and cool as possible. This Terrence was completely intimidating and a monster of a man. Absolutely massive compared to his own slight build. Solid, thick arms and hands that would be able to grip watermelons with ease, it seemed. Clean shaven, appeared clean cut, but underneath there was a mean streak in this guy, a feeling Jay couldn't shake once back in the truck and on the way out of the city.

"He was terrifying." Jay admitted and he had seen a lot of shady characters running the flipside. He'd seen them all, the mean ones, the tough ones, the overbearing ones, the deadly ones. He had never felt so strangely small in front of another person. Something about the eyes maybe.

"You were fine, Jayson." He laughed a little. But even he had to admit T was a scary dude. The size of him didn't help much. T was as brutal and frightening as the personality that emanated from him. "He just don't know you."

Jay was all nerves on the ride out of the city. Quiet, pensive. He had a million thoughts running through his head. Foremost in his mind was Julia at Mav General. He had to go home and tell her the truth.

"She'll understand, Jayson."

"Do you remember how well she understood this last time?"

"How did this happen, Jay? I thought you didn't fuck with Hay anymore."

"This is bullshit, Chess. I don't fuck with Hayley, I didn't."

"Jayson, it's clear that you did."

"Once. One damn time. She was home from Philly, mad at Kevin for the millionth time. I broke up with Jess, I didn't hook up with Julia yet. She was in between them."

"Well, that. I could see that, but Hayley."

"I didn't have a lot of girls in my phone, you know. I don't go out looking for it. It always kinda comes to me."

"Don't you ever just wanna go out and find someone you don't know, someone completely new?"

"I did that, too."

"Yeah, when?"

"Stef for one, but Adrienne, Jenn, and Sarah. I was with Jess for like two years and I didn't have anybody else-"

"But there's like always the one you have on back up that you don't hit up till things go bad with the regular one right?"

"No." Jay answered, shaking his head. "I don't have any back ups. I don't even look for any back up's when I'm with someone. What is wrong with you?"

"You're a different breed, I guess." Chess shrugged.

"I focus on one person at a time."

"Ok, nothing wrong with that."

"So on a scale of one to murder, how pissed is she gonna be?"

"I thought you two told each other everything."

"Ain't nothin' to tell, Chess. I didn't think it was important and you know how she feels about Hay. Besides, she was still fuckin with Tav at the time. I didn't think it mattered."

"Matters now. Don't tell her till you know for sure." Chess suggested. "Like Hay said, she could be Kev's. You could have been raising Kev's kid at the farmhouse. Ever think of that?"

"Hay didn't fuck with Kev at the farmhouse."

"All that time-"

"Yeah, in all that time." Jay nodded.

The flipside birthed strange bed fellows, birthed strange relationships with strange and deep connections. A connection lay in a crib in Philly. A connection burned to death in an abandoned building in Kensington and sparked a negative then positive chain of events afterward. Connections sat in a hospital room playing poker. Connections rode in a bullet ridden truck on the turnpike west toward other stronger connections. He hoped Julia would see it that way.

Chapter Twelve-Siamese Twins

48 hours after returning home, she stood in the Maverick police department next to James 'Jimmy' Darth, lawyer extraordinaire. He looked like a little troll, wispy, black hair going in several directions and beady brown eyes. His short stature was amusing, especially with his rotund belly, though he looked professional in his black suit and tie. Julia was nervous about trusting little Jimmy Darth, but Chess trusted him. He was Chess's lawyer.

But James 'Jimmy' Darth made her business his business and they sought him out specifically for advice on how to proceed. She wanted to walk in to Maverick PD, explain the situation and Jimmy advised against that till he heard the facts of the case and then spoke with her personally. The whole case hinted at shady and convoluted, especially after the justice she had carried out on the white male in her hallway, she disappeared similar to the intruder. He had disappeared like Houdini post mortem and no one had located him or determined his true identity.

Chess gave him a brief rundown of her case and then he requested the presence of all four of the individuals involved in his office. The day after they'd made their way home from Oakland, Maryland, the four gathered after business hours and sat with Jimmy. The fact there was an individual in front of him that had no identification and used Ray Morgan as an identity was troubling. Jody's involvement complicated matters and Julia felt strongly that he should be left out of it if possible. The police were unaware of Jody's presence and he was not counted as a missing person, because no one knew he was missing to begin with.

The four arrived and handed over statements with Jody in tow. He and Julia explained the entire ordeal once they arrived and awoke infected in Oakland, Maryland to the time they left. They omitted their conditions and they omitted specific details. Conspiracy, explosions, a zombie training town 4 hours away in small town Maryland. Jimmy was fit to be tied and had no precedent to go on. If Julia spoke the truth, they'd think her crazy.

"They already think I am crazy." Julia remarked and admittedly so, she had a history of mental illness and drug dependency.

"This is the way it'll go down. Little information, base it on the truth. Once detectives dig a bit, they'll be cut off at the pass." Jimmy advised her that he would meet her at the Maverick Police Station at 10am the next day and that she should arrive looking as battered as she arrived to his office.

"Battered." Julia repeated, giving herself a once over. She had her lumps and bruises. She had her composure though because days with lumps and bruises and scratches and scars were a regular damn day when combatting the dead.

Jimmy Darth tucked their statements in the file that he'd made specifically for this case and he bid them all farewell.

Very simple and lacking great detail, their statements were handed over to the local police department. The four who were at the home that day in question were advised to write simple yet coherent statements. Julia's was the longest and most detailed. It was concise and bare boned statement. She had a tendency to ramble, so the lawyer said keep it simple. Keep to the facts, don't speculate and that was what she did. She didn't feel as though it gave a very clear picture of what happened. The should haves and could haves were out the window. "You did what you did. It was justified. It's already been determined as justified, Mrs. Keller." The lawyer told her as she sat nervously in the police department's chairs. Waiting. She had been questioned by detectives before. She knew they only wanted facts and answers as well as anyone else.

The detective moved them both from the chairs to an interview room. She looked tired and she looked abused. The lawyer said to look as victimized as possible. "I am the victim here, Jimmy." She insisted. James Darth, her attorney, eyed her quietly. She insisted on calling him Jimmy.

They settled into seats, Jimmy Darth at her side and the detective seemed put off by this entire case. A dead body, a definite home invasion case, a justified shooting by a kid who knew very well how to aim and fire a glock, shooting to kill. She hadn't been as scared as she made herself out to be. She owned several weapons and knew exactly how to use them, staying calm in the midst of chaos.

"This doesn't explain where you've been since the shooting, Mrs Keller." The detective said, holding onto his cup of coffee as he sat across from Julia and the lawyer.

Julia looked to Jimmy who, at this point, was at a loss for words. He was informed of Oakland, Maryland and the events that unfolded from the moment she woke there until Jay and Chess arrived to the small abandoned town. The real story unfolded after she was abducted. The real story involved someone who had no statement and no verifiable identity. The lot of them, Jody, Jayson, Julia and Chess, all sat at Jimmy's office the day before and he was bound by law not to repeat any of it. He didn't see the point to repeating any of it either. No one would believe it. No one would...

"I understand that, yes." Julia replied, squirming uncomfortable in her chair. She had visible bruises and lumps on her. She'd been through the modern day apocalypse 4 hours south in Maryland. That and anything else that had transpired was none of his or anyone else's business.

"So, where were ya?"

"Off the record." Jimmy offered after a nudge from Julia.

"Ok, then."

"Oakland, Maryland." Julia responded like the detective had any clue about the place. It didn't appear to ring any bells, she had not said Disney World after all. "It's a matter of national security and when you check, you'll see that."

"Is there a written statement for the-"

"No. I won't write one." She answered. "I was abducted by Homeland Security. The man who was killed in my home was an agent, Special Agent Frances Pierce. His partner, Special Agent Paul Ford, removed me from the home and placed me in Oakland, Maryland." She paused to see if the detective was interested, disinterested or buying any of the story she was selling. "When I was in my room after I killed Agent Pierce, which I wholehartedly admit to, because it was me or him, you know, I was tranquilized and rendered unconscious."

"Tranquilized?" The detective repeated.

"Yes." Julia nodded. "I was also infected with the Z virus. I have been vaccinated. The point to Oakland, Maryland, was to observe how well my vax worked, whether I would then make it out alive."

"Out of Oakland, Maryland alive?"

"Yes." She nodded again. "I spent the good part of a week recovering with little food and water. Plus I have a bum ankle. So..." She paused, thinking of where she should pick up with her details. She wouldn't figure Jody into this ordeal. "I escaped once well enough and I returned home of my own accord."

Julia gave him a quick overview of Oakland, Maryland. It was fenced off, a zombie infested small town, part of a training course for agents and military alike. It was a place to showcase skills and survival capabilities. She volunteered to return with the detective, to Z-Town. "It's completely survivable, Sir."

"You do realize how far fetched this sounds."

"I do." She admitted.

"Let me get this straight-"

"You heard me correctly. There's nothing to get straight." Julia cut him off. "I can honestly say that if I didn't have a fracture and a one year old to deal with, there would have been 2 dead agents in the house that day."

"No doubt. You shot to kill."

"Well, honestly, that is what guns are for. When I aim one, I do not threaten or warn. The way I see it, the choice to die was made when he-" The lawyer placed a hand on her arm to quiet her. She had a habit of getting off on rants, he'd been warned. "Every shot hit chest or head. It was him or me."

He slowly rose from his seat and asked them to wait while he looked into the specific information she provided. Names, locations. It would take all of a few minutes to run the specifics and the coordinates to confirm her story. He stopped by the door and before exiting the small room, he asked, "How did you get out of small town USA?"

"I fought my way out."

"Alone."

"Yes." She replied. "Do you have any idea who I am?" She smiled softly. "When you make your inquiries, ask about Julia Morgan, not Julia Keller. Keller, you'll get no answers." She hadn't made a name for herself yet with the surname Keller and doubted she ever would. Anyone who knew her called her Morgan like a nickname similar to Jody. Keller didn't have a ring to it. Yet.

"Know anyone named Westinghouse, Mrs. Keller?" The detective asked when he returned to the interrogation room.

"What his true rank is, I am not sure, but I call him Commander-General." She answered. She didn't recall giving him commander general's phone number or his name.

"Lieutenant General Ronald Westinghouse speaks highly of you. You're free to go." It became evident that he had called the detective and not the other way around.

"Got your corroboration?" Julia asked, holding onto the lawyer and the table as she got to her feet. Damn ankle was throbbing.

"Off the record." He answered, holding the door open for her and James Darth.

She glanced at Darth and wondered what she even needed him for. To keep her out of the cells or the looney bin. Either way, she was free to go. Darth gave the detective a firm handshake and a business card. If there were more questions or concerns, the detectives were to contact him prior to his client.

Jimmy Darth accompanied her to the lot where Jayson waited by the car for her. They separated with a handshake and he reaffirmed that there was to be no further communication between herself and law enforcement. She was advised to call him first, any time, and he would address any further inquiries with her.

"Ok, so we're good?" Jay asked, giving her an arm. He waited as she got in the car and then closed her door.

"I suppose so, Jay."

"Feel like bar-b-q'ing? Chess wants us to stop by. I think he wants me to move furniture or some shit, like his brother isn't across the street."

"I guess." She replied dully.

They passed a few hours at Jess's house. Chess handed her a new pair of alien nerd glasses and he sent her to hang out with Jess and Tarin. She was going back on sitter duty in the morning. Life was going to get back on track for everyone, but it wasn't really on track for her. She purposefully derailed, forgot what it was like to live normally. She felt so tethered to the family, so purposefully married to it and she didn't need any rings to prove it.

Tavin showed up after work, taking a beer from the fridge and a seat on the patio with her and Tarin. She updated him on the case and her new glasses. Outside of that, she had nothing to say. Jess sat with her feet propped up, swollen ankles and feet. Julia sat with her leg propped up and wrapped.

"Ya alright?"

"My damn foot hurts." She complained. It was that simple. It had been weeks of it and the pain was making her miserable. Tylenol and Motrin didn't touch the pain and she had given up on both of the over the counter analgesics. "I want a script for Percocet or some oxy or something."

"Too late for that." He replied, thinking no one would give her a script this late in the injury.

She opened her phone and she scrolled through her emails. She kept a long list of contacts in that email in case she ever lost the phone. Before she dialed a number, she looked at Jess. "He can get me drugs."

"I don't know." She replied, nonchalantly like she had a clue what Chess was or wasn't into.

She closed the email and set her phone aside. One of them needed to start this bar B Q before long, because she was hungry. She put a hint or two in Jess's ear and they decided together to get everything together and then move it all outside to the table.

"Tav, cook please."

"Me? I'm a guest." He answered, getting up from the seat he'd taken. He started the grill and did as asked.

"Where's Kell?"

"No clue." He answered. She sometimes stayed at home and sometimes she stayed with Jess or Sandy's. Depended on her mood and wherever she went, she kept in mind her babysitter. Jess was a fill in for Julia while she went to school. "I'm gonna sell the house."

"Again, Tav?" She asked.

"We'll talk, and I'm serious this time." He replied. "We'll talk, Julia, ok."

"Yeah, sure. I think it doesn't matter what I think."

"Don't get pissed off. I'm giving you back what you put into it."

"Not mine to give to me. Give it to Chess."

He had already had this discussion with Chess. During the week that they were away and his house was destroyed by MIB, his son placed in danger, he decided he wanted nothing more to do with it. He needed to separate himself and his son away from that madness. He also severed his relationship with Kelly. Julia let him carry on a full conversation with himself in front of the grill, didn't hear five minutes worth of his ranting and most of it was done under his breath.

When Jay and Chess came downstairs, found them on the deck, it didn't look too much different from the usual at home activity. Julia on her phone ignoring Tavin at the grill while he bitched about his life.

"Percs, Chess. Find me some." She demanded as she pointed at her ankle.

"Why me?"

"I need something better than Tylenol."

"I'll get ice, baby." Jay volunteered from the fridge as he got a beer.

"Fuck the ice." She whined. She had tired of ice and over the counter pain management. She was tired of going to the place in her head that remedied the pain. It didn't work for her like it worked for Fry. Fry learned to embrace pain. "I don't wanna do this anymore."

"Wanna get high, Julia?" Jayson asked, rolling his eyes.

"What?" She asked. "I want the pain to go away. I don't-I know I have an addiction, but god damn it, my foot hurts. I don't wanna get wasted, Jayson. I want to feel good."

"I asked if you wanna get high, not wasted." He stated.

"You don't understand me."

"You don't understand me, Jules. I asked if you wanna smoke. I heard you."

"Oh, well sorry then, Jay."

"I been listening to you. I listened to you at the ER and when you were at home before you disappeared and then when you came back home, all the way through a 4 hour drive. If you wanna smoke, then you fucking can. I don't have percs."

"I'm sorry, Jay. I'm hurting."

"Ok, understood."

"What happened to the special part of your brain?" Chess asked curiously.

"I'm not her. I don't hide in there. Besides," She said, getting to her feet. "I don't like it there."

"Why? If it'll help-"

"It doesn't help." She snapped at him.

She felt highly irritable and moody. She spent part of her day explaining herself and her actions to a detective who already had justified the shooting. She had to do it alone, despite the fact that Jimmy sat next to her. She couldn't share Jody's side of the story and he had been victimized as much as she had, if not more, having been purposely infected with a virus that could have and came close to killing him. The crime that Agent Pierce carried out was bad enough and it should have ended there. The crimes that were further dished out to her and the man Agent Ford perceived to be Jayson would never be brought to justice. It wasn't fair. And Jody couldn't complain to anyone other than his family. Legally, neither of them had recourse. Neither had protection from a government that wished to play games.

Tavin opting to sell his home and move and somehow extract himself and his kid from the conspiracy was a delusion. It served to hand over his control and his power to a governing body. She felt angry that he'd made that choice and then she felt horrible that he was faced with that choice. Tavin believed in some way, shape or form that he could self exit this conspiracy. He could not. They could live and deal with it or expose it, but they could not escape it. He was kidding himself.

In her brain, she felt like her usual self. The chemistry that coursed through her and around her, she still separated from. Julia Fry's essence flowed through her blood, hardwired in her nervous system. Even though her soul was silenced, part of her true essence had been left behind. Julia had mentioned to Jay a couple times since the switch that it was like living as a Siamese twin. The other one was always right there with her, every where she turned. Live with it and deal with it, but until Julia herself was gone, Julia Fry still existed to some extent. She had transitioned.

But they didn't get it. Every day was a bad damn day. She hadn't had a good day in years. She had many purposeful days and she had touched lives in both reality and the flipside, but purposeful was much different from happiness. They were not the same achievements. How would she fight to live when she didn't want to live most days? She kept that quiet, between herself and her Siamese twin. She knew she should feel grateful to be alive, to have another chance. But to what end? Change and acceptance were tangible, but always just out of reach. She had no goals, no life, no meaning. She was as empty as she had ever felt. Were they all feeling the same way? Was she the only one who felt void and empty? So, she posed the question to Jay as they sat in the rear of Jess's yard beneath the willow tree, smoking the first joint that she had smoked in months. She hadn't enjoyed weed in a minute, had preferred other more potent recreational drugs and alcohol.

"No, I'm alright." Jay replied, passing her the joint.

"Why do I always feel like this?" She took a drag and filled her lungs with smoke. The thick, unfiltered smoke was heavy in her chest. She held it deep inside and coughed it out. Red eyes, dry mouth, coughing. Percocet didn't have that effect. She floated on oxy's. Pot made her head swim.

Jay could speculate and explain and think about that question she asked, but he doubted she wanted any answer. Pain had a strange effect on her. "Jules, stay off the foot."

"Easy for you to say." She whispered, then took another hit off the joint before passing it to Chess.

He took a hit and then watched the two of them have this strange silent communication. He'd seen this from time to time when Jay would take care of her and his actions spoke louder than words. He was always so soft and gentle with her. So tirelessly nice and sweet with her. Chess knew he wasn't answering that question of hers. He wasn't in the mood to indulge her. Not that he couldn't fathom her pain or understand a good portion of it and from where it stemmed, but there were days he tired of her as much as she tired of herself. His mood wouldn't enlighten her or make her feel any better.

"Well?" She asked, bringing him from his own thoughts and back to reality.

"I'll make a call, get your Percocet." He replied. He'd rather drug her and have her happy than withhold the drugs and have her in unnecessary pain.

"Oh, well, thanks, but-"

"Jesus, did you ask me for them or not? I am not in the mood for your issues, Julia."

"I don't want anything, then. Not if you think I'm making this up, no."

"No, no, no. Jules, please don't start." Jay whispered.

"Me?"

"Yeah, you." Chess answered her. "You're so selfish sometimes."

"Selfish?"

"It's what I said."

"You've done enough for me. Don't do one more thing, Chess. I don't mean to sound bitchy or ungrateful, but I'm in pain."

"Quit acting like this. You weren't on the fuckin flipside and you don't have to go through this game you play because you got stuck in Zombie town."

"Game."

"Poor choice of words-routine may be a better description."

Jayson had a pretty good grip on her at this point, but the mouth he wouldn't be able to control.

Shared circumstances, shared emotions, shared experiences. It was all so depressing. One more time she had endured and lived to tell about it. One more time she stabbed and exploded and shot her way to civilization through a horde of inhumanity in order to preserve her own humanity. And what for? What was the point? Was her family cursed? She was tired of living with a target on her back, running and avoiding the apocalypse fulltime in reality, but embracing it like a long lost friend on the flip side. The more she thought and mulled over the experiences in real time, the more confused she found herself. The pain shooting through her leg was an unwanted bonus.

"I'm not drug seeking." She said with tears in her eyes. "That's what you think, isn't it? You think because I'm-my leg is broken. It is swollen and it is still bruised and you try to walk around on it and you try to deal with it and still fight off the dead and-why bother arguing?" She sighed, wiping tears away from her cheeks. "I won't say another fucking word." She stood up and wrestled her arm away from Jayson.

"Kinda harsh, Chess. She's serious, man. She cried all night long."

"Take her back to the ER, then. I don't trust her."

"Well, dammit, she's high now." Jay looked as she limped away. "I'll take her when she comes down."

"Getting her high was not a good idea, Jayson."

"I know, but she needs something. She didn't even enjoy the pot. She loves pot."

Chess was quiet.

"She said no one ever believes her. She said-"

"I don't believe her."

"She can get drugs, Chess. She doesn't technically need you for drugs."

"You enable her, Jayson. You believe every thing that comes out of her mouth without a second thought."

"We should give her the benefit of the doubt, though. Sometimes." Jay got up and caught up to her. "Wanna leave, babe?" He asked, putting an arm under hers.

"No," She cried. "There's nothing wrong with me." She tried to smile and she tried to find some truth in Chess's assumptions.

"Hey, why ya crying?" Tavin asked.

"I'm drug seeking." She frowned and kept moving past him.

"Nah, if you wanted drugs, you'd go get them." He told her as he took her arm and then sat her down. He crouched in front of her and he unwrapped her foot. "Looks worse than the day you injured it, Julia."

"I'm a drug addict." She cried as he moved her foot all around, flexing and extending and feeling for pulses.

"Even drug addicts feel pain, Julia." He said. "And not only that, the pain receptors in our brains are turned off by the illegal drugs. After a while, we cannot manufacture our own natural pain killers. We got them, you know."

"And ours are turned off."

"Kinda, sorta, yes. Go get this x-rayed again. You could have reinjured this."

"I did when I was carrying Tarin upstairs." She whispered. "The day that man came in our house. I had to get him upstairs, Tavin, and hide him from-so he wouldn't see or get hurt."

"Well, you got some limited range of motion. Pulse is good, but-" He looked to Jay. "Take her to the ER, please."

"She just smoked."

"So let her come down some and take her over there."

"In the morning." Julia told him. "I will, in the morning. Remember what happened last time we went to the ER?"

Jay woke early, went for his run and then when he got home she hadn't come downstairs or even attempted to get out of bed. Chess had got her 10 Percocet and sent them home with her, but they still sat sealed inside a small bag on the table next to the bed. His words had hurt her, his assumptions had hurt her, he'd insulted her and she refused to self medicate in case he was right and she was wrong. She spent hours debating whether she was actively looking for a reason to get high or whether she felt true pain.

When he showered and came in the bedroom, she lay crying in bed. He forced her up and out and once she was done in the bathroom, he took her back to Maverick General's ER. She hadn't had anything to eat or drink since the night before, having absolutely no appetite. Her blood work came back and her labs were off. Her blood count was low, her white count that indicated infection was high. She had an IV started and the nurse started an antibiotic while they waited for transport to take her to the x-ray department. She had laid on a stretcher for 2 hours while the staff made the normal inquiries and drew labs and set up some plan of care. The ER was practically empty at that hour of the morning. Jay sipped coffee and waited while she was oddly removed and quiet.

The nurse mentioned a fever, which was no surprise to either of them, but 102.4 was excessive even for her. Her over the counter pain medicine had been masking the signs of her true infection, which showed on the x-ray when it resulted.

"Mrs. Keller, we're admitting you." The ER doc said as he approached the stretcher.

"My foot hurts." She said.

"The fracture is healing and improved."

"My foot hurts." She repeated, crying softly for what would start the third hour in the ER.

"You have what we call osteomyelitis. It was seen on the x-ray. You need IV antibiotics."

"I need morphine." She complained. "My foot hurts."

"How long will she be in here?" Jay asked.

"A few days. You should start to feel better after a day or so of antibiotics."

The ER doc left her and Jayson in their curtained space and prepared to move her upstairs. Before they rolled her out, the nurse gave her a dose of morphine through her IV port.

"It's painful, what she has?" Jay asked the nurse when Julia fell asleep.

"Yes, and she's a very sick girl."

"Morgan, Julia-022695, Pennsylvania Original Infantry." She mumbled. She could hear herself speaking tired words through swollen lips. She refused to lose consciousness. She refused to let them break her. Normally she would say that she had been through worse, but at that point in time she had her doubts. She kept her eyes clamped shut tight, avoiding eye contact and avoiding the humiliation they handed her. All of them, one after another. Through the tears and the pain and the violation, she remained quiet only whimpering as it went on. Initially she screamed and sometimes, the weaker ones, she fought tooth and nail.

"Hold her down, she's stronger than she looks."

She had taken hit after hit. She felt the blood running from her mouth, the metallic taste of iron and she spit on them.

"I can't do this anymore." She muttered internally and she finally gave up to the brutality and the violation of many upon her. She gave up, allowing her limbs to fall limp, to succumb to the madness. In order to play this game, one had to be as violent and as absurdly insane as those who played against her. Such is life.

"Such is life." She moaned, dragging her sore body from the corner toward the heat source in the room. She had been loosely and she had no clothes on, still naked only bloody and dirty and sore in areas she didn't volunteer to the men who'd raped her.

15 years ago...I could not bring myself to admit that act had been carried out on me. I can admit it now.

Men slept around her, those who perpetrated the crime and slept soundly. The odor of flesh in the room. Her face swollen, her lips fat and sore, her tongue cut from her own teeth, her eyes swollen shut from the hits to her face. She would cry, but feared the tears may sting. She sought the warmth of the fire. She craved warmth as her body shivered and she was post trauma and her muscles were tensed and aching. She shivered inside and outside.

I would prefer death to this...

As she lay as close to the flame as her bindings would allow.

"Want something?" A familiar voice asked.

"Water." She replied.

She heard, yet did not see, the lid unscrewing from a canteen. A calloused hand touched her chin, tilting her head and the canteen was held to her lips. She drew water into her mouth and swished it around the stinging, bloody hole. It took every thing she had not to swallow it. Instead, she spewed it as hard as she could in to the air in front of her. "We have a spitter." He remarked, hand still under her chin. "Don't bite the hand that feeds, Morgan." He commented as his free hand slapped her hard against an already battered face.

"Fuck you. Kill me." She laid back and hopefully away from him.

"My men, they were not brutal enough? I'm surprised you're alive."

Because nothing can kill me...

She had no idea where she was or how she had arrived in this place. She recalled little of her day that led to this. They had completely taken the compound. They had completely decimated the nest and were moving in. She had sent D off to canoodle with Katara. He'd taken a liking to the small and tough child. He swore she returned the sentiment.

"Pull out, D." That had been the last memory she had until the burlap bag went over her head and the ties bound her wrists and ankles. Hands on her body, she couldn't fight while secured in ties.

She lay by the heat and absorbed it. This...is why...there are no females...in infantry.

"Morgan," Raven summoned her. "Heading out."

"My name's Keller." She heard herself shout, then awoke suddenly. The room was dim, the over head light was out and the IV dripped into her arm. Morphine...had the morphine taken her to Jersey to visit Jack 'Raven' Daniels...like the whiskey? She shuddered at the thought. Had she linked to future Julia or was that only a dream? When she woke, she recalled the entire day, but it had become a bit blurry once the morphine was in her system.

"Julia, you Ok?" Chess asked, rising from the seat next to the bed.

"Hmm, yeah. I think so." She answered, stretching and moving around on her bed. "I feel so much better."

"You were knocked out." He whispered, taking a spot on the mattress with her. He held her hand. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" She asked, holding his grip and pulling herself up to a sitting position. "Wow, how long have I been out? I feel good."

"5 hours or so. Jay went home to get a few things. I told him I would stay with you till he got back. I didn't believe you, Julia."

"I was so mad. I was up all night crying again. I didn't even take the percs." She frowned purposefully at him, scrunching up her face.

"But you're really sick."

"Looks that way, huh?" She replied, tugging at his hand. She pulled him to her and hugged him. "I'm gonna be ok. They said I would be Ok." She wiggled her toes and flexed her foot. "Hey, look at that." She whispered against him. She pulled back the blanket and moved her foot around. "See, I told you. Don't beat yourself up over anything, Chess."

"I feel bad though. I shoulda paid better attention."

"It's all you've been doing lately. Take a break."

"I should have taken your feelings into consideration."

"I was not making you smile on the inside, Mister?" She held an arm around his neck and poked his belly...like Julia would...that one little touch, small gesture took him to a different time and place to a different girl who looked just like her. She kissed his neck because that's where her lips were, head resting on his shoulder.

"Julia?" He asked quietly, cocking his head to look down at her.

"Hmm, yes." She replied, her voice ever so light and calm.

He felt the familiar little pin prick on his palm. His stomach flopped and he pulled his hand from hers. "Don't do that." He cautioned her.

"Do what?" She asked with a slight giggle.

"What's your safe word?"

"Strawberries." Julia answered, a whisper in his ear. "Ha, it's always been strawberries, like forever."

"Yeah, I miss you, you know."

"I know. But you're making up for the loss, I think. You're being so sweet and doing things no one asks you to do. It's like you already know what I need before I need." Her lips brushed his neck again, ever so soft and he pulled away.

Don't go there...don't go there...he reminded himself to stay out of the memories and the feelings for one or both and he pulled away. Not the right time and not the right place. In no way, shape or form would he allow...history to repeat itself.

"Stop it, Julia. What is it with you and hospital beds?" He recalled briefly the last time they shared a hospital bed. In the lab, he tied her to it. Jesus...he stood up and moved completely across the room from her. What was she doing? "Are you high?"

She raised her right arm, "Morphine." She answered honestly. "I feel no pain. It's delightful. I haven't had a shot in so long I forgot what it felt like to feel no pain at all. It's nice. I could get used to it."

He sat in the chair and folded his hands in his lap. "Which one am I speaking to exactly?"

"Both." She shrugged, laying back on the bed. She straightened out her hospital gown that was ten times her size and she hoped Jay would bring her some pajamas from home.

"Because of the morphine." Chess assumed.

"Forever linked and the morphine brings the little beast out." Julia laughed, flexing and extending her ankle. "I feel so good though." Her mannerisms changed with the inflection of her voice. "Morphine." Julia repeated. "I'm allergic to morphine." She whispered, looking at Chess. "I'm not allergic to morphine." Julia sighed. "It was not an allergic reaction, it was an overdose. Duh." She couldn't help but have these thoughts aloud and she sounded insane to listen to.

"Twins." Chess mumbled. If anyone could handle the duo it would be Jayson.

"Siamese." Julia snorted, reaching for the remote control.

"Hey, but I am allergic to an antibiotic. Which one?" The pensive and serious tone to her voice puzzled him as she debated in her head the antibiotic.

"I have no damn allergies."

"I do, though."

Julia glared at Chess. "No more morphine." She stated in a matter of fact way. "Man, she's right fucking here with her mouth." Julia grabbed her forehead.

"Penicillin, I think." Chess told her.

Julia reached up and turned the light on above her bed. She glanced at her IV bag. "Vancomycin 1 gram." She said reading the name of medicine on the bag. "Well, I'm not dead yet, so I would say-" She was cut off or paused, he wasn't sure which. "Look it up. Can you, my Chess?" She batted her eyelashes at him and he cringed. Which one was that? They both addressed him as 'my Chess' in the past.

"Jay's bringing your phone, Jules. Research all you want when he gets back."

"You never came for me." She snapped at him, spinning her body over the side of the bed and nearly got up. If it hadn't been for the IV tubing, then she would have been in his face.

"What?" He asked. "I did come for you. We searched high and low for you and we found you. What the hell is wrong with you, woman?"

"I told you I never wanted to see your face again." She hissed at him, balling up a fist as she went for the IV tubing. "You, I will kill you in your sleep, you rotten piece of shit." She yelled at him.

"Babe, what are you doing?" Jay asked as he entered the room. He hadn't seen her so angry in a long time and every time she got angry, it had always been with Chess.

Her head snapped toward his voice, her entire face contorted into shock and then her jaw dropped open. "Jay..." Her voice barely audible, only a breath that said his name. Then the tears flowed freely.

"On that note, good night, brother. Julia, I love you and your legion. Call if you need anything."

"What the hell did he do now, Julia?" Jay asked as he caught her, kept her from falling as she placed that left foot directly on the floor.

"Oh, Owwww, what's wrong with my leg?" She asked, pulling it back from the cold floor and allowing Jay to catch her.

"You have a broken ankle and you have a bone infection, so get back in the bed."

"Broken? Where's my cast?" She asked unaware of her status.

"It's healing well. You didn't need one." He guided her back to the edge of the bed and sat her down. He set the bag down on the floor and then sat with her a moment. It was then she allowed herself to forget Chess Morgan ever existed all over again. She embraced the boy she hadn't laid eyes on in decades and held him tight enough he couldn't get free of her arms if her tried. "I brought you some things I thought you'd need. Lemme go, I'll put your phone on charge."

"Phone? Like a cell phone?" She asked, separating slightly and looking at the bag on the floor. She took a moment to look around, eyes scanning the room and the monitor and the IV. "Oh, I'm in a hospital."

"Yes." He nodded. "Are you alright, Julia?"

"This, my Jayson, is a moment that I have only had the pleasure of dreaming for twenty-five years. I'm not at all interested in the cell phone."